Photo: Hryck.

It’s no secret I love my beer, and selecting an imperfect beverage is detrimental to a great night out. At least until you’re too drunk to care what you’re drinking.

But sometimes inspiration is needed, a new brand uncovered or an old brand not yet discovered. What flavors go with certain foods? What factors cause the greatest hangovers? Which brands have the highest alcohol content?

While it took me years of professional college boozing to learn the tips and tricks of the trade, there are some people who can school you on beer and save you the trouble of 5 p.m. hangovers before they happen.

Gerard Walen combines his love for road trips and beer to bring you all the latest news, festivals and everything else beer related.

Mike, Paul and Joe know their stuff. Their website is conveniently organized: Amber ales, Beer reviews, Brown ales, Stout, Pilsner, and more!

Four funny dudes blogging and Tweeting about pubs and beer-related fun. One of their blog entries is titled, “LT gets tasered in Arizona for putting a White Castle Candle on a plane to Russia.” Their bio reads, “All we need is a pitcher of cold beer, and the world’s problems. Give us a few minutes, and problem solved!” Can’t argue with that.

A Canadian beer fanatic, Stephen Rich does it all: beer menu design, beer bartender, beer tasting events, and and more.

The Beer Runner is, “Someone equally devoted to fine beer appreciation and an active, healthy lifestyle.” It’s true, just check out the ”Beer Running and Biking Round-up.”

Greg and Rich are the Beer Snob and the Beer Slob. They film their reviews of beer from around the world, and have fun in the process.

Ashley V. Routson is a “[p]rofessional beer writer, craft beer evangelist, foodie, wino, social media addict.” For the Wench, beer is her hobby, lifestyle and career. She’s so hardcore, she chews on dried hop leaves instead of gum.

Photo (and Feature Photo): f650biker

James Marks and P.J. Bumstad are two Columbus-based beer geeks drinking their way through the city.

“Your Choice. Your Beer. Drink Up.” BeerUniverse reviews three different categories: beer, bars and breweries. A fun Twitter account to follow with a great website dedicated to all things beer culture.

Matt Simpson offers education in beer, whether it’s just for fun, or for those who really take their brews seriously.

Carla (The Beer Babe) wants to know what’s in your glass. She travels all over the place visiting brew pubs, beer bars and breweries while simultaneously convincing me it’s time for a career change.

Discover how to create your very own distinct beer flavor. Just make sure you’re not a lousy brew master. Their website (BeerCrafting.com) even offers a book with more than 640 beer recipes – my favorite kind of cookbook.

OK, though technically not a beer Tweeter, Modern Drunkard Magazine has hilarious booze-culture content and Twitter updates. For example: “Nothing like a tall rickety ego to lift you above that ever-rising river of Impending Doom. That and a half dozen bourbons.”

Community Connection

Did we miss anyone? Share your favorite beer Tweeters in the comments below.

Are you a glutton for punishment and a beer lover? Hal Amen is conducting the most torturous American Beer Experiment ever in a nationwide blind taste test. Get on over to Introducing Matador’s ‘Best Worst Beer Experiment’ and give us your input for the US’ worst beers.

Photo: Cleavers, Feature Photo: mulmatsherm

CNN recently published an article titled 7 Reasons to Lose the Booze in Flight. Some of the points make a lot of sense, like that being intoxicated may be a problem in case of an emergency. Other issues, like “it’s embarrassing,” seem easily rectifiable. For example, stop drinking.

So here’s a list from the other side of the beer mug, six reasons to keep the booze in flight.

1. Booze helps to strike up a conversation. Rejoice in the boozey camaraderie of your neighbours, clink those glasses, and share stories of your journeys.
Someone’s kid is screaming like a banshee, and if you can’t drown out the noise you may punch someone in the face. Two glasses of wine later, the scream turns into an adorable drone. You turn to the parents with a toothy grin and say, “Yer baby is sooooprecious.”

2. Alcohol will help you relax. Some people take powerful relaxants before stepping onto a plane, is that really worse than having a drink or two? I once saw a woman devour a large shopping bag of candy in an effort to deal with her anxiety mid-flight. I’ll take a cold beer instead, thanks.

3. Your chances of joining the mile high club will increase significantly. Get the cute girl or guy next to you liquored up, and then invite them to get all airborne up in your business.

Photo: Andres Rueda

Nothing screams romance like bumping uglies over a toilet seat. Remember, be sure he or she is into it. Otherwise the rest of the flight will be a tad awkward.

4. It’s easier to start a spontaneous airplane sing-a-long. Start singing and have the whole plane join in. If the folks from Improv Everywhere can do it in a grocery store, you can do it in the aisle of a Boeing 757.

5. The cramped space, lack of good food and neighbour B.O. all become more tolerable with each drink. Enough said.

6. It’s a great way to kick-start a vacation. Your holiday begins as soon as you step onto the plane and leave the office behind. You owe it to yourself to tip back a glass of wine and enjoy the perks of having no responsibilities, even if it’s just for a few days.

If booze in-flight is really such a big problem for so many people, airlines should enforce tighter alcohol regulations. If someone is leaning into the aisle and up-chucking their bag of peanuts, cut them off.

The thing is, most people know how to have a good time without being drunken idiots. Like Omri Ceren points out in his Vagabondish article, “…folks have to live and let live.” As long as the pilot isn’t drunk, right?

Photo: marksteelenz, Feature Photo: philosophygeek

So I was drunk in the bed of a moving truck last night… Hit a speed bump and somehow rearranged my face.. Cut, blood, whiskey hangover…

worth it just for the drunk midgets

definitely hooker spit. definitely poor choices. definitely hungover.

Getting ready to meet my friend for some chicken wings, beer and football, in Farmville.

got shitty drunk with my husband last night and for the first time said sorry for intentionally running someone over with my car

i’m going to feel so bad for my twitter when i look at it and i drunk tweeted myself…

it feels wrong to go to church hungover

My butler George says his hangover is probably caused by the the bottle of champagne he drank after his usual bottle of Scotch and 10 beers.

some fat old drunk guy broke into our house and tried to fight everybody.

apparently being drunk, and riding a tricycle, can still get you a DUI.

Now I know why those shots were called blue eyed blondes. They’ll kick you in the face and steal all your money.

i’m not sure if which was worse, getting robbed or a 52 year old drunk man in my house at 3 am trying to sell weed. i hate this street.

I learned a valuable lesson last night — never get drunk on an open tab. I’m sure there are more lessons to be learned from last night.

Photo of mildly homoerotic hotdog feud and the rest of the photos in this piece courtesy of the author.

Whether you’re a townie (born and raised in the city), a bayman (from the wilds of isolated Newfoundland) or an outsider, George Street has something for you – and I’m not talking about herpes, necessarily.

Early Evening

On the weekends, people begin milling around the street sometime shortly after supper. Business suits take drinks on the ritzy patio of the Martini Bar, while a more casual crowd orders nachos on the Sundance Sundeck.

As the sun sets, vendors shuffle their hot dog carts and french-fry stands onto the street, ready to seduce visitors with promises of greasy goodness and merchandise of questionable nutritional value.

Tip: Do not eat the street meat. Ever.

Mid-Evening

Masterless Men Playing

Starting around 10:00 PM, the party gets started. Pubs such as Greensleeves and the Rob Roy set up for live entertainment which includes local bands cranking out accordion and fiddle music and solo artists.

Regardless of the venue or entertainment, I have never known any band or musician to be acknowledged with anything except loud hollers of happiness, jig stomping, and hip grinding on the dance floor. Grab a beer, and join the party.

Late-Evening

Unlike many places in Canada, the bars in St. John’s stay open until 3:00 AM. If you’re in the mood for dancing and being felt up by the opposite sex, check out Konfusion, where the confusion extends beyond spelling. If being mauled by sweaty college kids isn’t exactly your thing, head over to Dusk Ultra Lounge for sexy lighting and an older, more diverse crowd.

How to Maximize Your Time on the Street

The party does not stop on the weekend. For residents living in downtown St. John’s, hearing loud music and drunken assholes at all hours of a weeknight is a real hassle (unless you’re me, who considers this clamour a lullaby). Most bars and pubs have a specials night, such as Turkey Joe’s which hosts Lady’s Night on Sundays and The Dock which offers 3-4-5 beers (three beers for $5) on Thursdays.

Woman of the Night Taking her Evening Constitutional

When you want to get so hammered that Toothless Tom becomes your best friend and you eventually go home with a stripper, you need to attend a George Street event, when the street is closed down from end-to-end, and party-goers pay a cover fee for the entire street. This means that a $15 charge allows you to wander from bar to bar in a happy, drunken stupor for the entire night.

You can even pour your drinks into a plastic cup and socialize freely between bars. Assemble with the rest of the drunkards in front of the stage situated in the middle of George for some live music. Oh yes, this street has its own stage.

For street events, check out St. John’s very own Mardi Gras, which takes place at the end of October (Newfoundlanders like to do things differently). The town shows up in a colourful array of Halloween costumes, and prizes are awarded for Best Dressed.

Canada Day is another important event, but the real height of shitfacedness can only be reached during George Street Festival at the end of July: one week of open bars, live bands on the street, a real Newfoundland kitchen party, and hundreds upon hundreds of drunken fools and slutty females.

Like Disneyland, Except for Drunk People

The real magic of George Street is that there is an endless supply of bars and pubs to be discovered. After living in this city for three years, spending nearly every weekend downtown, and actually walking through the street to get to work every day, I still find myself catching a glimpse of a bar I have never seen before in a hidden alleyway, or a club long since forgotten from my early college years.

I’m often puzzled as I walk into quiet, less crowded venues like The Well and Trinity Pub to realize that these pubs have a great deal of personality often overlooked for the popular, more crowded nightclubs.

Everyone in St. John’s has a love-hate relationship with George Street. They hate it because at some point they toppled down the concrete stairs and puked in some girl’s purse; they love it because the street provides an endless opportunity of hook-ups and short skirts.

So when you’re in the middle of the street on a warm summer’s evening, drinking legally in public with hundreds of people all enjoying live bands, an alcohol-infused tear of happiness will slide down your cheek and you will sip your cold beer and say, “Honey, I’m home.”