All photos are stills from “Unbelievable” with Takeshi Kitano aired in 2008.

She creates evocative images in ways that startle the viewer with unexpected techniques. Ingenious sculptures show a new form when illuminated. What looks like a photorealistic print from a distance is created on a white sheet with judiciously applied shoe prints.

Photos of this art have been making the rounds on various websites, seldom giving the artist credit. We are perhaps more inclined to view this work alone, behind a computer screen, to express our appreciation with typed words we share with people we will never meet. Anonymous viewers for an anonymous artist.

I love this video for more than the fabulous artwork. Kumi Yamashita, her pieces, and her process are presented by Takeshi Kitano as magic and adults appreciate them guilelessly.

Art on TV? Viewers who don’t feel like they have to present a neutral expression or have a degree in art or art history to discuss art? Art as magical and something to be appreciated by everyone?

Community Connection

Are you dying to know more about visiting Japan? MatadorNetwork’s Japan Focus Page has a wealth of information to slake your insatiable curiosity until you make it there in person.

Photo of a bhang shop in Jaisalmer, Rajasthan: Tom Maisey, Feature Photo of a guest house in Manali: ElPablo!

You don’t need to be a hesher for the job, but it probably helps to have a handle on the language. MatadorNights wants to bring our readers solid information about marijuana around the world. What are the laws? Is it safe to smoke out? How do you find some? You get the picture.

As a general guide, please see this post. It may be a little lackluster, but it was written by someone who rarely indulges (that would be me), so if you can tackle this topic with enthusiasm and aplomb, please send a sample by selecting a country and writing a blurb about the marijuana experience there. Paste it into the body of an email and send it on over to kate [at] matadornetwork.com with the subject line: Ganganator

The articles will be broken up by regions, so we’ll do Europe, Eastern Europe, Middle East, Central America, South America, Northern Africa, West Africa, and so on. We can throw in country specific posts also. Want to tackle state laws in the U.S.? Great. The most important thing is factual information about the laws and the marijuana culture in each article.

There may be more than one worthy candidates, and in that case we’ll take this on a pitch to pich basis.

If you can battle the anti-motivational syndrome and bust out two of these a month, that would be ideal. Each article will pay $25 via PayPal.

In case you’re curious, MatadorNetwork doesn’t publish under pseudonyms. If that crushes it for you, sorry.

Photo: theogeo

At Matador, we like to give you the best information we can. More than 200 comments on our Guide Smoking Pot Around the World have made us realize that a comprehensive guide is an important thing for all you heshers out there, but it’s got to be tackled a little at a time. So we’re starting with Southeast Asia.

Before we get into the nitty gritty of what the laws are, let it be said that the ways these laws are enforced are often different in theory than in practice. The well traveled toker will tell you that many countries’ laws are not strictly enforced and that you can escape sentencing by bribing Johnny Law. Check with local smokers upon arrival to get the lay of the land.

CannabisCulture.com reports that under Brunei law possession of over 600 grams (about 21 oz.) of pot is punishable by death. In a 2004 case, a man was sentenced to death by hanging after being caught with 922 grams (about 32.5 oz.).

According to the U.S. State Department, “Penalties for possession or use of, or trafficking in illegal drugs in Brunei are severe, and convicted offenders can expect long jail sentences, heavy fines, and, possibly, death.”

As the Islamic nation of Brunei does not appear to be a popular destination spot for marijuana enthusiasts, tales of thwarting punishment are few and far between. As always, we invite your comments and will take your corrections if you find the information here lacking.

According to GoSEAsia.com, Cambodian drug laws are spottily enforced, but punishment can range from between five years to life in prison. A PDF provided by the Association of Southeast Asian Nations outlines Cambodia’s drug laws in a confusing and poorly translated tangle of legal jargon that you probably won’t be able to make sense of if you’re not high (not that you could if you were).

A 1998 Cannabis Culture article outlines the criminalization of the drug in 1996, but deems Cambodia as still being a haven for heshers. How harsh could they be when they’re home a restaurant called Smokin’ Pot?

Weed smokers with Cambodia in mind would be well served to check out a Reefer Smoke blog from July of 2009 that paints a green picture of this “Stoner’s Paradise”.

WeBeHigh.com provides a comprehensive guide to Bali for the pot enthusiast but warns that penalties are severe and strictly enforced. This information is from 2006, so may be a tad out of date, but the site reports that police seldom hassle tourists and can be bribed.

Photo: Lenny Montana

The punishment for trafficking is death while possession could land you with 10 years in prison. Though uncommon, it’s not unheard of for a tourist to wind up serving a long sentence. The famous case of Schapelle Corby who faced the death penalty but is now serving 20 years for trafficking (she was bringing drugs into the country) may serve as an example. Be cagey if you decide you’ve got to get stoned in Indonesia.

Travelfish says marijuana is the easiest to find drug in Laos, but warns that no drugs are legal. A 2009 post from WeBeHigh.com says that in Vientiane and Laung Prabang, you need not ask for pot, rather you will be approached, suggesting richshaw drivers as being in-the-know should you not find yourself bombarded with pot vendors.

The real problem here is opium, so police are less likely to worry about pot. Still, discretion is advised. Specific details of the laws are pretty hard to find, but the Australian Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade reports that the death penalty is still on the table there. Finding yourself in prison in Laos could mean enduring incredibly inhumane treatment and possibly rape.

The good news is that if caught with less than seven ounces and you won’t be presumed to be trafficking. The bad news is that trafficking carries a mandatory death penalty. A poorly spelled entry on WeBeHigh warns not to get caught. Even small amounts of weed can land you in prison and we’ve yet to run across accounts of bribe friendly officials.

Looks like word on the street in Malaysia is to be very, very careful if your need for weed can’t be squelched. If you must buy, ask a local in a discreet way. Foreigners trying to buy will have a hard time of it.

Photo and Feature Photo: nicasaurusrex

MyanmarNarcotic.net appears to be a site for propaganda to honor the eradication of narcotics. Perhaps you could attend the latest Destruction Ceremony and swipe a little of your drug of choice.

A document provided by the Association of Southeast Asian Nations seems to indicate a mandatory five to ten year sentence if caught. Actually, that’s the sentence for “[c]ultivation, processing, transportation, distribution, transmission, transfer, forced to cause abuse, misbehaviour on the exhabits of narcotic drugs and psychotropic substances.” It’s the closest thing we could find to information about the worst case scenario if caught toking up in Burma.

WeBeHigh.com tells us that drug laws in Papua New Guinea are “strictly enforced by the courts” and that even very small quantities can land you in prison for between three to five years. They also say that police can be bribed, so if busted you should ask to be fined or ticketed and that should be enough to help you thwart serious trouble.

Philippines instated the death penalty for trafficking in 2002 and then rescinded this policy in 2006. WeBeHigh reports that five grams can land you in prison long term and suggest heavy bribes (in the hundreds of dollars) to escape punishment.

If you are planning on getting high in Manilla, their guide seems to be a rich source for learning where to buy and where to smoke. It seems that despite the penalties, pot is easy to find, and if you’re careful you shouldn’t get in trouble.

Disable the volume before watching this video of how to roll a spleef with a banana leaf in the Philippines and check out the comments on YouTube if you need a laugh.

The death penalty is a real possibility for those caught trafficking pot in Singapore. GoEastAsia.com says “400 people were hanged for drug trafficking in Singapore between 1991 and 2004.” WeBeHigh.com recommends not smoking there at all saying, “Even if you smoke you will not be stoned because of the paranoia level.”

We believe them. However, if you must, be extremely careful.

Photo from Koh Tao, Thailand: Retinafunk

Check out a few forums and you’ll find that travelers generally recommend not trying to buy weed in Thailand. A blogger on CannabisTV.eu tells a tale of a local being set up trying to make a small buy. She was piss tested by police when they caught up with her, found not to have drugs in her system, and released. The same blog recounts stories of discos being raided and revelers being urine tested on the spot.

WeBeHigh.com suggests asking taxi or tuk-tuk drivers in Pattaya for a hook up and that you won’t get a good deal unless you buy a brick. GoSEAsia.com points out that trafficking is punishable by death but that the death penalty hasn’t been enforced since 2004.

According to StopTheDrugWar.org, pot use in Vietnam is typically punishable by confining users “in mandatory drug detoxification centers for up to two years, or in some centers, up to five years.” Dealing of large quantities is punishable by death.

As of 2006, WeBeHigh.com was recommending checking with local expats about the climate as the method of punishing public use was changing rapidly. Sound advice in any country.

Community Connection

We really want to hear from you on this one, guys. Did we get something wrong? Any great stories from Southeast Asia? Let us know what you know below.

I guess those aren’t the kind of White Stripes they mean.
Mashup photo by Kate Sedgwick and licensed CC with original photos by michael morel and Beverly & Pack

The ad featured a song which sounded too much like “Fell in Love With a Girl” to be a sound-alike and aired it during the Super Bowl. The White Stripes are using this opportunity to register an anti-war message in a public forum.

The Air Force has pulled the ad which drew parallels between several fun-looking extreme sports and part time military service which would obligate reservists to be called into active duty at any time. Those who bought the message might be expecting a weekend at the ski hill and instead find themselves embroiled in full scale war.

What many news outlets seem to be missing are audio clips for your comparing pleasure. Below, watch the Air Force Reserve ad followed by the video of the original song.

Community Connection

Want to create your own propaganda without the copyright infringement? Check out How to Get a Knockout Soundtrack for Your Travel Film on TheTravelersNotebook.

Some things go far beyond what we like to poke fun at. This and all photos: Kate Sedgwick

And while Buenos Aires is famously the land of the tango, leather, some of the most delicious grilled meat in the world and Spanish with an Italian accent, a less known fact is that it’s the world capital of men’s tragic hairstyles.

Aside from the more sane and pedestrian choices you’ve seen before (though it may have been 20 years) such as the rat tail, or the mullet, there are styles here that defy simple names.

It wasn’t a zombie. It was a squid. What?!! It’s still there?!

What he’s done, for all intents and purposes, is to make his head into a giant squid. This is business in the front and sadomasochistically restrained, brain sucking sea creature in the rear.

I have seen this hairstyle flowing free and so long that it reached to the wearer’s ass with dreads that were the thickness of a great dane’s ropey turds.

Nights Co-editor Tom Gates has pointed out that many of these men seem to be getting laid as they can often be seen (as the man above was) at the side of an adoring woman. How is this possible?

This is far from the only style incorporating dreadlocks that would have people pointing and laughing in other places on earth.

Male pattern baldness isn’t stopping him from wearing… Wait what the hell is that?

I wanted to fit in everywhere and wound up fitting in nowhere.

A hybrid between a D.A. and a mohawk with a nearly two foot long dreadlock the diameter of a big toe positioned to the side to show how different he truly is.

Let’s examine what’s going on here. Elements of greaser, punk and hippy combine on the head of a young man prematurely balding to create one of the greatest hair abominations that’s ever been.

In some places, I think the urge to rip this dreadlock from this guy’s head would be too strong for some young, drunk punk to resist.

A young man sports a frosty fauxhawk reverse-chelsea fringe mullet.

As it is all I can show you is the hair of the young man from the bus stop today. A frosted faux-hawk gelled into submission looks okay from the front, but this kid is sporting a white-blond curly fringe that hearkens rat tail and mullet both.

The one I saw in the bank was worn by a serious and balding business man and tapered at the base of his head. Because of the bald patch on the top, the back looked like a ’70’s porn vagina. Poor man. I bet he didn’t know why he was suddenly so happy when the barber held the mirror up so he could see the other side.

The saddest of the sad. Cat turd bouquet mullet and skullet.

Why? Well, when I’m minding my own business waiting for the bus and am suddenly confronted with a bouquet of cat turds less than a foot from my face, I’m startled.

I may even gasp before I understand that no one is maliciously attacking with feline fecal matter, but that there is a full grown man in my proximity who has decided of his own volition to sport a mullet or a skullet with atrophied dreadlocks, often less than three inches long in a little clump at the base of his skull.

This man exhibits the mullhawk in maroon with two cat turd width dreads poking from the side and an unkempt beard and sideburns that meld with the sides of the head.

Is he a hero in his audacity or is he tragically fashion impaired?

Community Connection

If no poo hair is what you want, it’s what you’ll have. Find out how through Matador Community Member katsunlove’s travel blog or start your own Matador blog today!

The Porn Star Photo (and Feature Photo): Môsieur J. [version 3.0b]

Below are categorized 8 of the worst kissing styles as reported by women who’ve traveled the world over.

The Fish Photo: jaroslavd

The fish turn his lips inside-out and rather than articulate them in the way one might if there were any actual nerves in them, seems intent on encompassing the partner’s lips in a wet and slimy embrace. Were his saliva red, it would leave his partner vaguely resembling Bozo the Clown. Thirty seconds with a fish and anyone with any kissing panache will be swimming against the current to get away.

Without prelude, the archeologist opens wide in a gesture that demands the same of their partner and then, with a hard and pointed tongue digs deep into the recesses of her mouth in an apparent attempt to discover any bits of kidney bean or spinach left over from lunch. This aggressive overture will quickly bury the present for posterity to be dug up over apple-tinis and belly laughs with the girls.

The Archeologist Photo: USACE Europe District

Usually accompanied by equally limp and timorous caresses, ON might (in total darkness) be mistaken for someone in a semi-vegitative state. The texture of the tongue brings to mind a raw scallop reanimated to terrorize and disgust those that would cross its path.

Encounter a chupacabra and you might fear that your eyes will cave in from the pressure. Heaven forbid that your nose is clogged or you might find yourself in need of the kiss of life. Chupacabra creates a vacuum that will leave you panting, but not in a good way.

A little teeth go a long way and the nibbler hasn’t been apprised. This tooth heavy kisser makes a snack from your lips, and while this style can be used as an accent, it’s best used sparingly like cloves or semicolons. One false move and you might need a stitch or two. Do not kiss a nibbler on a moving car or bus.

No, no, no. The lips are over here. It’s hit or miss with the hunter pecker whose pop kisses fall short of the mark and never amount to much even if they reach the target you’d think was intended. Trying to make out with an HP is like getting it on with Pepé le Pew and just as likely to have you squirming out of his reach while listening to words meant (we guess) to get you pecking back.

The Flipper Photo:robinvanmourik

In the way pinball flippers nervelessly jump, Flipper’s tongue has something to prove about its prowess in the cunnilingus department. Someone needs to tell him that a mouth is not a clitoris and that this sort of behavior is likely to make the demo more than unnecessary.

No one told this poor fellow that they kiss this way in porn because the air is believed to kill the harmful bacteria accrued in the previous scene. That or it’s all for show because the action takes place in plain sight. Video porn on demand is teaching the next generation that attempting to high five your partner’s tongue and then vibrating it violently while hissing to demonstrate your arousal is appropriate when really, it’s something best enjoyed alone with a jar of vaseline.

Community Connection

Find out where kissing can get you thrown in the hoosegow in No Kissing Law Passed in Guanajuato, Mexico, and be sure to read more tales of love at a dead end in Notes on Love at First Sight.

Most of the time it couldn’t be said to be an improvement on the architecture many take for granted. Spend a few days here and it’s part of the scenery. Proclamations of love for another person, a football team or a band are the bulk of it.

But within your first week, you’re sure to run across a wall that makes it obvious that not all graffiti is the human equivalent of a dog pissing on a fire hydrant. There are some places where you can see several different styles co-mingling to produce something that makes passers-by stop and consider the message, smile, admire, crane their necks and squint their eyes. While the art scene worldwide is getting more elitist as time goes on, this is art by and for the people of Buenos Aires.

It’s only fitting, then, that GraffitiMundo, who gives graffiti tours in English, sheds light on the artists and their processes in an accessible way. Marina Charles, who leads the tours, doesn’t get bogged down with curatorial jargon that means nothing to the average viewer. She takes visitors through the graffiti renaissance after the dictatorship pointing out key art and artists off the beaten path from Chacaritas to Villa Crespo and ending in Palermo.

Find yourself in Buenos Aires and advance reservations and $75 pesos (less than $20 US) will get even jaded art veterans excited about art again.

All Photos Kate Sedgwick. All Rights Reserved.

1.Led by Marina Charles (pictured here in blue), the tour starts at Tec’s in Chacaritas. Many artists collaborated to cover the largest side of the artist’s home including Parbo, Chu, Defi, nasa, and Bleep.

2.This piece by Gualicho was finished in three days. The artist works alone and quickly.

3.Two views of fenced in animals by RunDon’tWalk. Giant red creature: Tester, Big Yellow Robot: Bleep.

4. Luchadors by Jaz and Nemeremen.

5.The founder of Run Don’t Walk Collective shows us how it’s done. I was star-struck when I saw him pull out the stencil I had so admired in other locations throughout the city.

6.One gallery from the tour, Casa L’Inc. Works are affordable and appealing.

7.Across from Casa l’Inc, bits and pieces of a wall where many have contributed. Tightrope walker: (artist unknown), Man with a Stick: Jaz, Bat and face stancils: BsAsStencil, Tu basura es mi tesoro (Your trash is my treasure): RunDon’tWalk.

8. Stencils at Tegui: Vomito Attack. An upscale restaurant has employed Vomito Attack to assure the eyes of all passing pedestrians have only one place to turn. This photo is a compilation of about 20 photos. For more details, you can check out the process on the collective’s Flickr Page.

9.Outside a photo studio, artists have surrounded this bus hangar with giant pieces. The Devil Head is by GrouLou, and in the background are Ever’s giant heart and RunDon’tWalk’s head of a smoking man in 3-D glasses.

10.Collaboration on a house. The owner was approached by artists who, sketches in hands, made a case for this impressive piece. Massive pieces like this discourage taggers from leaving their mark. This wall is a collaboration by Triangulo Dorado.

11. A piece in Palermo very close to Hollywood in Cambodia by Ever.

12.The tour ends at Hollywood in Cambodia. A bar and gallery, Hollywood in Cambodia is a two storey riot of art and stencil work with pieces for sale in the back. Dog with camera head: RunDon’tWalk, Decapitated Fish: Tec, 3-D Geometry: Nerf, sailor cat and bird: PumPum, any help in further identifying artists depicted here would be appreciated.

Community Connection

In the know about the artists who created the above work? Help us link to the artists we didn’t know by adding your comment below.

Planning a trip to Buenos Aires? You might want to have a peek at our Buenos Aires focus page to open your intinerary to more of what the city has to offer.

Want to leave your touch on the world without getting thrown in jail? Check out 10 Places Where Graffiti is Legal before planning your next adventure.

You can hear the whole story on NPR’s Planet Money, but this video stars Billy Scafuri and Adam Lustick as economists Fredrich Hayek as John Maynard Keynes battling for more than the right to be the best MC. The two theories presented in the video are the foundation of how most economists see economic cycles.

Community Connection

Still worried about the economy? You can find out which 5 cities are the best to live in if the economy keeps tanking on MatadorAbroad or find out how to deal with the economy through spiritual activism on BNT.

Here’s one way, while in Turkey, to delay gratification:

Community Connection

Looking for more treats? Pop over to MatadorAbroad to be even more tempted to head to New Orleans for Mardi Gras with Indulgence in New Orleans: A Guide to 7 Classic Desserts.

Original Photo of Quincy Jones by World Economic Forum with tweaks by Kate Sedgwick and licenced CC.

Organized by Quincy Jones and Lionel Richie, artists invited to be part of the the 25th anniversary recording of the ’80’s hit include Usher, Natalie Cole and John Legend with the hopes that Grammy weekenders will stay over a day in L.A. after the award show is broadcast January 31st to bring the song back to life.

Jones produced the original version in 1985 to benefit famine relief efforts in Africa.

Last Friday’s Hope for Haiti Now telethon (which raised $58 million toward the relief effort) aired a new song featuring Jay-Z, Rihanna, Bono and The Edge called Stranded (Haiti Mon Amour) coordinated by producer Swiss Beatz.

You can see a higher quality video of the song at Rolling Stone and read about its production. You can buy a copy for yourself now through iTunes, along with other songs featured during the airing of the show including performances by Alicia Keys, Bruce Springsteen, Mary J. Blige, Shakira and Sting among many others.

100% of the purchase price goes toward relief efforts by reliable organizations including Oxfam, the United World Food Programme, and the Red Cross.

Community Connection

Add MatadorChange to your roster of sources to keep you informed in the latest relief efforts in Haiti and find out what you can do to help.

“We’re here to roll around in your bed for you, sir.” Photo: Exercise Tradewinds 2009, Feature Photo: Carly & Art

Do you call for a turndown service? A cup of warm milk? A soothing hot toddy?

Or how about a team of grown ups in “special all in one sleeper suits” to come roll around under the covers of the bed you’ll soon be snuggling up in to warm it up for you?

Sound creepy?

It can’t be creepy. As the Holiday Inn sleep doctor Chris Idzikowski (director of the Edinburgh Sleep Centre) has explained, it’s science!

Dr. Idzikowski (as quoted in Telegraph UK) says:

Maybe what you hear when you read all that mumbo-jumbo is:

It’s a far cry from the days of the quarter fed
massaging bed. Photo: grenade

If that’s the case, just ask yourself: What’s more soothing than multiple strangers dressed in adult sized, terry-cloth footie pajamas coming into your room and rolling around your freshly bleached sheets before you get into bed?

As a spokesperson for the Hotel is quoted as saying, “The bed warmers service is a bit like having a giant hot water bottle in your bed, warming it up before guests climb in to give them a great night’s sleep away from the cold – of course they jump out before you jump in.”

Let’s hope they aren’t serving beans for the employee meal.

Okay. Maybe science doesn’t have a strong enough explanation to make this an appealing prospect, and no matter what they say, people aren’t water bottles, but if you happen to take advantage of this opportunity being offered in the London Kensington branch of the hotel, we hope you’ll let us know in the comments field below.

Community Connection

There have got to be better ways of getting to sleep! For more ideas about that, see MatadorAbroad’s How to Sleep in Your Vehicle.

Photo and Feature Photo: noellium with tweaks by Kate Sedgwick and licensed CC.

For those that don’t know, the rider (or backstage rider) is the contract signed by the promoters that hire musicians to play and includes not only the preferred snacks and meals of the talent, but specifics on required equipment, manpower, and security. Failure to meet any or all specifications without prior written permission from the band’s management may result in cancellation of the show. This is standard procedure.

Seen to be the absolute height of rock star prima donna-ism, Van Halen has revealed that the brown M&M clause was an insurance policy of sorts. If that part of the contract were overlooked, it could be assumed that parts of the rider that insured the band would be provided proper equipment that would not make them sound like ass, or at worst electrocute or smash them beneath tons of amps had also been ignored.

Snoop Dogg’s demand to have a Playstation with four controllers and “1999 sport video cartridges” provided can probably not be considered a safety issue and as years go by, it’s probably harder and harder to fill this requirement as personal assistants are likely scouring e-Bay for versions of Madden, Triple Play and NCAA College that are more that 10 years old.

The personal direction of the phrasing, “Please trust that this will be some of the most important money you spend,” sparks the imagination. What would the consequences be? Are Snoop Dogg’s lackeys too stoned to remember to pack their own video games?

This and all direct excerpts of the riders are screencaps of material at TheSmokingGun.

Well, thanks to TheSmokingGun, there is a massive collection of riders available for your inspection and amusement. They’ve even gone to the trouble of categorizing acts by genre and sussing out the funny parts, detailing them and putting red arrows next to them so you don’t have to work so hard to find the weirdness.

The rider that made me develop a crush sight unseen on Jos Grain, roadie for Iggy and The Stooges (and said to be the best rider ever by TSG) is excerpted below:

This and all direct excerpts of the riders are screencaps of material at TheSmokingGun.

Not all acts treat the rider as a platform for their roadie’s future stand-up act – in fact this appears to be the only one that does.

Check out Chuck Berry’s dead serious transportation requirements:

In other words, gas money. Right?

Poor Barbara Streisand.

Original image: Alan Light with tweaks by
Kate Sedgwick and licensed CC.

Whoever’s been threatening her (unless this is completely borne of her own paranoia) is sure to be gratified to see the lengths to which she is willing to go (and put everyone around her to) to insure her own security. Can you see her as the heroine in a Lifetime movie? It might be more amusing than the role she played in Funny Girl.

My mom’s from Minneapolis, home of the infamous Bob Dylan. His cigarette hoarding ways were legion there where it was reported by many fellow party-goers that Dylan would bum cigarettes all night long, waiting until everyone had smoked their last before deigning to smoke from his own pack when all stores were long closed at which point he would refuse to share with anyone. The apple must not fall far from the tree. Check out these entitled (AND EMPHATIC!!!!!) requirements from Jakob Dylan.

While “absolutely no reference” may be made while promoting The Wallflower’s to “Bob Dylan’s Son,” who else but second generation, spoiled rock royalty comes on like this? Hope he gets everything he needs.

This and all direct excerpts of the riders are screencaps of material at TheSmokingGun.

Though their self indulgent rehab-rock has turned me off for quite some time, The Red Hot Chili Peppers have seemed at least to be people that would be fun to hang out with. Certain tour rider requirements have me thinking otherwise.

This and all direct excerpts of the riders are screencaps of material at TheSmokingGun.

“I can’t relax! It’s just too damn blue in here!”

The Black Crowes should have someone who’s not talking to angels write their rider contract.

This and all direct excerpts of the riders are screencaps of material at TheSmokingGun.

Which is it? New and opened or new and unopened?

These are but a few. If you’re looking for a way to kill a few hours, or a recipe for comedy gold, I recommend digging through the available contracts yourself.

Community Connection

More interested in low maintenance travel for musicians? MatadorGoods might have just what you’re looking for. Have a peek at 12 Small Instruments for Travel.

Planning on taking the act on the road? Before you do, see 5 Things You Should Know When Traveling with Musical Instruments.

Photo: shimriz

Dubbed the anti-energy drink by the L.A. Times, this is the answer to Tab as the un-cola 30 years later.

When describing the water they use, the company treats customers as if they are idiots with a college education (or maybe this is their attempt at humor), using three dollar words and flowery language to tell us exactly how carbonated the drink is and the nature of the water they use saying:

Photo is from a screen cap at http://relaxingsoda.com/

“We don’t do heavy ‘masking’ carbonation. Just enough for a light, natural fizz to open the taste buds. The carbonation is added to natural spring water, which is a ubiquitous chemical substance essential for human survival. It can be found as a liquid, solid, or gas. We chose the liquid form since it’s a little easier to consume.”

Maybe you already have to be high to get how “natural spring water” might be produced in a solid or gas – or perhaps you only need to be a California native, as you likely would have to be to buy that “natural spring water” is necessary for human survival. According to the LA Times, the Relaxing Soda is enjoying huge success in California for which Jerry Hirsch
credits the legal use of marijuana and the “cannabis-oriented marketing campaign.”

In addition to “lightly carbonated water”, the company website lists as ingredients all-natural cane sugar, passion flower extract, and kava extract. It is the kava extract that is credited with the relaxing effect of the soda. If you’re thinking of replacing another addiction with Mary Jane’s, be aware that “[c]hronic and heavy use of kava for a period of three months or more has occasionally been reported to cause a scaly, yellow skin rash and an eye irritation.” (Wikipedia)

Community Connection

Didn’t get your fix? Check out BraveNewTraveler’s A Brief History of Weed or Community Member MARIEMMC’s blog Big Milly’s on Friday Night about her Ghana road trip.

Photo and Feature Photo: Joel Washing

Not lucky enough to be among them? You can always do the next best thing and visit a convention near you that gathers bright talents from around the globe.

Photo of traditional Thai tattooing being done: Binder.donedat

This year will be the first Bangkok International Tattoo Convention where you can see Arjan Noo Kanphai at work whose traditionally done Thai tattoos are renowned for their magic. Other artists who will be there include Mick Zurich, Shige, Horitsuna (who specializes in Tebori – traditional Japanese hand tattooing), and Mike Ledger.

Another tempting pick for the month of January is The Singapore Tat2 Show from the 8th through the 10th.

Our pick for February is the Third Annual MusInk Tattoo Convention and Music Festival in no small part due to the musical lineup which includes The Buzzcocks and The Damned. If you buy a three day pass for $75.00, you can also see NOFX and The Cult along with Jim Rose. Their listing of tattoo artists includes Mick Zurich and Hori Sho of Tokyo and mostly Californian artists and shops including Juan Puente of Black Rose.

The second annual Sydney Tattoo & Body Art Expo features 200 + artists, mostly Australian including Mik Massingham and Mitch 13, Nick Morte of Norway and French artist Noon.

Photo: bog king

Featured Artist this year at Edmonton Ink Festival is Tattoo Jake who’s been tattooing across Canada since the ’80’s and offers a history of tattooing on his website along with problematic and unsafe practices he’s seen on tattoo TV shows.

Other artists will be listed on the site soon, but past conventions featured a roller derby, a graffiti wall and special guest Lizardman Erik Sprague and his stand-up routine.

A list of artists from all over Europe and the world can be found on the International Needle Art Convention website including Tattoo Jan Studio, and Carl Cooke’s Artful Ink of the UK. The lineup is not complete this far out, but you can see last year’s at the website to get an idea.

Tattoo Fest 2010 lists Victor Portugal of Kraków, Jef from Boucherie Moderne in Belgium and Guil Zekri of Germany and “many more” as artists whose trust they’ve gained. Does that mean they’ll be there in 2010? Check the website in the coming months for more information.

Photo of Elaine Davidson, World’s Most Pierced Woman:
MissAgentCooper

The 6th International Tattoo Convention kicks off in Stavanger, Norway at the end of July. If you’re not impressed with the no frills website, just look at the spectacles beheld at the 2009 event by scrolling down and clicking “Pictures 2009.”

2010 will include Sid and Noi Saimese, both formerly of Thailand, Vatea of Haiti, a bevy of Norwegian artists and many European artists.

Last year, Isobel Varley, the “Most Tattoed Senior Woman” according to the Guinness Book of World Records appeared along with Eliane Davidson, the world’s most pierced woman.

The lineup for Hell City is nowhere near complete yet. The four artists confirmed for the Phoenix Show are all from Clic Collective in Virginia, while their Columbus, Ohio show in May is far closer to hammered out.

The website states they are not an average tattoo convention which must be true when they offer a children’s area (Heck City Kid’s Zone). They promise “everything from live entertainment on the main stage, to music, to free seminars, live forums, The Art Fusion Experiment, tattoo competitions every day,” and of course, the ubiquitous Suicide Girls.

A shot from the London Convention: beerandnoodles

We’ve talked about The London Tattoo Convention on Matador Nights before. Details are few and far between for the 2010 lineup, but as the time draws near, buzz should get going in the forum.

In the meantime, you can peruse last year’s artists and events to get a good idea of what will be in store for you should you make it in 2010.

The Barcelona Tattoo Expo will be in its 13th year on 2010. In 2009 the convention had more then 9,000 visitors and 134 exhibitors. While there is little information about this event, you can subscribe to their newsletter for updates. 2009’s schedule was chock full of activities.

Photo: redkidrob

If the past two years are any indication, Florence will hold its third tattoo convention this November. Last year featured loads of Italian artists including transplant Don Alejandro Cervantes of Tattoo Mexican Family and his clan, and photo-realists Matteo Cascetti and Tiziano Ripanti of Il Gatto e la Volpe. Many European artists and several Japanese artists including including Hiro, Horinao and Ritsu from Cat Claw Studio were on the roster last year as well as a couple of Americans and one Brazilian.

It’s pretty certain that December will see the 20th Berlin Tattoo Convention. Only just completed, 2009’s event included Herbert Hoffman, billed as the oldest tattoo artist. Last year, Vatea tattooed in the real old school fashion – without a machine, and 150 artists worked and were showcased from locales as far-flung as China.

Looking for more conventions? Check out Karen L. Hudson’s guide on About.com as it’s updated throughout the year to see if you’ll be near one in 2010.

Community Connection

This list brings you one tattoo convention a month worldwide and picks are partially based on date, so many greats have been excluded from the list. Is there something you’d like to see here? We invite your comments letting us know below.

Check out MatadorTV to see Thai monks tattooing in the traditional way and the tattooed taking on the attributes of the tattoos they’ve gotten.

Torn about being tattooed? You can read Matador Community member kburg’s blog about what a tattoo can mean for your employment in Korea.

The apparently masochistic Caga tió smiles in
anticipation of being beaten until he poops out your
snacks for Christmas.
Photo: Wikipedia

A perfect illustration of this point is the “Tió de Nadal” (Christmas Log), more popularly known as “Caga tió” (shitting or pooping log) – a tradition of Catalonia.

Starting on December 8, the hollowed log is ‘fed’ each night and tucked under a blankie so he won’t get cold. Then on Christmas day or Christmas Eve, the family gathers around and sings to the log as they beat it, loosing ‘poop’ such as figs and turrón to be shared by all the assailants. At the end, the log will crap out a herring or a head of garlic to signal the treats have come to an end.

Similar traditions are practiced in areas near to Catalonia and are thought to be related to the Christmas tree.

According to Wikipedia, this is the one of the many songs sung to the Tió de Nadal prior to and during its beating:

Graphic: Kate Sedgwick

Community Connection

Still Interested in Catalonia? We thought so. Check out Matador Community Member Frannyink’s informative essay about the living architecture of the Castellers of Catalonia.

Have something to tell us about? Become a member today and get busy with a blog of your own.

A train stopping snow in Buckinghamshire in February, 2009 – Photo (and Feature Photo): MonkeySimon

High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire, England

50 customers including 20 children were treated to just that in the bed department of the John Lewis store on Monday the 21st after intense snow stopped traffic. They were outnumbered still by the staff of the store which totalled 54.

They were fed, though there’s no word what was available to eat, before they all cuddled up in the beds that were made up for the purpose and settled in for a night of shut eye.

Deborah Strazza, the store’s managing director says, “It was so sweet, the kids absolutely loved it. They thought they were in Toy Story.” She is a mother, too, and couldn’t square herself with the idea of stranding families out in the snow. According to Independent, she went on to say, “The customers were really, really grateful and they could not thank us enough.”

Surely the cost of opening several packages of bed linens pales in comparison to the feel good word of mouth advertising of grateful customers. Good call, Deborah.

Community Connection

Matador Community member Global Grasshopper gives us the Top 10 Destinations for Holiday Shopping in the UK and John Lewis is mentioned. Make that last minute road trip using her list!

Become a community member and share your recommendations with a group of world travelers that is growing every day.

Photo (and Feature Photo): cliff1066™, Remix CC by Kate Sedgwick

176,492 Facebook Group members made it possible for the 17 year old Rage Against the Machine hit “Killing in the Name” to clobber other choices for the Christmas Number One Slot in the UK. The group, run by Jon and Tracy Morter, was set up to unseat the schmaltzy picks of Simon Cowell that ooze forth from speakers all over the UK throughout the holiday season each year. The Christmas Number One is big business and a big deal in the UK.

From the RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE FOR CHRISTMAS NO.1 page:
Are you getting fed up about the possibility of ANOTHER X-Factor Christmas No.1? …us too…so we’re going to do something about it!

We are all buying a download of ‘KILLING IN THE NAME’ by RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE right NOW! until the end of Saturday 19th December (23:59pm).

They succeeded. It was less about the song itself and what the song represents – the antithesis of “The X Factor” (read Britain’s American Idol) host’s powerful campaigns to exert sway in the pick for the Christmas Number One.

From the page – a celebratory message.

They had to tell participants not to download more than once and to follow industry guidelines to prevent their selection from being disqualified.

They are apparently dedicated to improving quality of life beyond the aural realm. They have also raised more than £60,000 for Shelter, a UK charity group dedicated to securing homes for the homeless and campaigning against homelessness. When they realized how much attention their page was getting they thought it would be a waste not to direct some of that attention to the greater good of humanity.

In 2008, the #1 was “Hallelujah” by Leonard Cohen as covered by Alexandra Burke. In 2007 it was “When You Believe” by Leon Jackson, and in 2006, it was Leone Lewis’ “A Moment Like This.” “Killing in the Name” will forever be etched on the Christmas Number One for 2009, representing the general public’s dissatisfaction with warmed over sentimental claptrap for Christmas.

Community Connection

Interested in change from the ground up? Find out 10 Ways the International Community Must Help Africa from MatadorChange.

Photos are screencaps of iPhone screencaps of the application from the iTunes store.

While Diddy’s BlackBook is free from iTunes App Store, it is likely to be the only thing that is. The iPhone app is a pairing of Diddy and BlackBook to bring you the best in clubs, bars, dining, hotels and shopping in fifty cities worldwide along with reviews written by either the people at BlackBook or P Diddy’s personal assistant. Want to know where you can blow $50 on a martini in any major metropolis? Wonder no further.

One reviewer on the iTunes page says it was totally worth the $0 that he paid for it while another called it useless, citing the fact that the 50 featured cities are hundreds of miles from any location he’s likely to be.

Still, if you’re interested in finding out where Sean Combs hangs out (or is at least willing to say he does to add clout to BlackBook’s reputation while likely being paid and surely garnering advertising for his varied endeavors, such as the Sean John store), you’ve got nothing to lose except your sense of contentment and pride as you realize that the majority of recommendations far exceed the scope of your budget.

As one incredibly wealthy and naive fan or BlackBook lackey puts it in his review, “Now I can party where Diddy parties, eat where Diddy eats, travel where he travels.”

There seem to be discounts and incentives to visit the featured locations which are used like a coupon shown on the screen of your iPhone. There are more BlackBook iPhone apps available as well and while the suggestions may be worthwhile and in fact a new way of seeing a city, to believe that the stores and businesses being advertised aren’t lining the pockets of BlackBook or its featured celebrities would probably be a little soft headed.

This seems to be a new form of advertising along similar lines to product placement in movies, with the difference that the audience is made up of volunteers. Perhaps with the discounts and special offers it’s a mixture between pretending you’re a rock star and the Entertainment coupons your grandma humiliates you with by presenting them before the meal. All I can say is that while it may be hip, it also strikes me as slightly tragic.

While gay marriage is permitted in 10 % of U.S states, marriage between cousins is permitted in 50%.

Photo and feature photo: masochismtango

H.G. Wells, Albert Einstein and Darwin all married a cousin. While gay marriage is still illegal in most of the nation, marrying your aunt or uncle’s kid is okay in half the states in the Union including four of the five most populated.

While many right wingers assert that the main reason to prevent gay marriage is to protect children, the risk of genetic mutation and birth defects resulting from shared DNA doubles in marriages between cousins (from 3% – 6%). There is no risk of birth defects to children from gay unions.

While many would cite confusion about the roles of relatives as a secondary harmful factor to children of gay unions, it may be even more confusing when it becomes necessary to explain how Andy is little Craig’s uncle and his grandpa or that Mommy and Daddy are both aunt and uncle and mommy and daddy.

For your information, marriage between cousins is permitted in Tennessee, Virginia, New York, Vermont, Massachusetts, Rhode Island Connecticut, New Jersey, Maryland, Alaska, Hawaii and Washington D.C., and with conditions (such as state mandated genetic counseling or that one or both of the parties be beyond breeding age) in Utah, Arizona, Wisconsin, Illinois, Indiana, North Carolina, Maine.

Gay marriage is currently permitted in Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, and Vermont, and will begin in New Hampshire on January 1, 2010.

Community Connection

Want to read more about gay marriage? Check out MatadorTrips’ Best American Spots for a Same Sex Wedding.

Photo and feature photo are screencaps from the NPR website.

Along with the Concert Page with free concert downloads they offer the Song of the Day. I’m picky. I dislike more than I like, so it’s great to find a place where there’s a new sound and artist offered up every day to sample.

Check out Erin McKeown’s dissonant Put the Fun Back in Funeral, or OutKast’s So Fresh and Clean. The song of the day is all over the place and you’ll find something new or old that you need to listen to just when you need it.

Community Connection

Interested in How Music Connects Travelers? Check out 10 ways over on TheTravelersNotebook.

Image and Feature Image CC licensed byKate Sedgwick with images courtesy of Sarai♥WoaH Photography♥ and elliottbledsoe

The barley that makes the beer is “related to [barley] that spent five months aboard the International Space Station,” according to Newser who (I think jokingly) suggest you bite the bullet and pay the $110 it costs to buy a six pack, further competing in a lottery for the privilege, and which you must live in Japan to enter.

International Space Station courtesy of NASA via Kowh

According to Gizmodo,only 100 liters of Space Barley are to hit this very exclusive market which is said by the Telegraph to be the first purely barley beer.

If, in what may be the 11,000 years of beer making the world has seen, brewing a purely barley beer is a proposition that has been overlooked, I can only surmise that the flavor must leave something to be desired. Add that this is not actual barley from the space station, but barley spawned from space station barley and what you have is something akin to Mackenzie Phillips charging a million dollars Indecent Proposal style for a night of bliss with the daughter of the famous John Phillips of Mamas and Papas fame – that is to say an unappetizing prospect, sweetened by novelty and press, but probably not worth the price.

Still, if you care to peruse the Sapporo R & D report on the new product, be my guest. And if you do get a taste of the first all barley beer of extraterrestrial origin, please share your opinion of the experience in the comments field below!

Community Connection

Space. Is it the final frontier? Die hard travelers might want to know How to Travel to Outer Space.

Two Freud look-alikes frolic with a blonde in a bierschwimmbad. Photo courtesy of Starkenberger.

“Enjoy the wonderful and cosy ambiance and savor the impressing wall paintings, a highlight of the Starkenberger Biermythos!” exclaims the website for Starkenberger Bierschwimmbad. Biermythos is just what it sounds like it would mean: the myth of the beer, and maybe you’ll be coming up with your own tales of Paul Bunyan style proportions after dog paddling a few laps around one of these pools.

Having a swim in some beer might be
more affordable than you imagine.
The cost is per pool, not per person.

Bierschwimmbad means beer bath in case you were wondering about a literal translation there.

Located in Austria 170 km from Munich, the Starkenberger Resort offers meals served to you “lying on a coach in a kind of Roman style.” (I’m pretty sure they mean couch.) They claim Cleopatra used beer baths to make her skin supple. The resort itself is said to be in a castle, but you can check out the main website and its picture to judge for yourself.

While Starkenberger may be appealing to your grandiose side when they ask you to participate in their Biermythos, you can still take a tour with a beer tasting included for €8 before making up your mind to submerge yourself.
Open only on Fridays, the Bierschwimmbad requires a reservation.

Community Connection

Looking for more good news about beer? Hop on over to Matador Change to see how Drinking Craft Beer is Good for the Environment.

All photos are screen captures of the original video below.

The Eyewriter from Evan Roth on Vimeo.

The Eye Writer can be made for $50 using free software.
Here you see how it tracks the artist’s eye movements to draw.

We imagine all innovation made to enhance the lives of people who have suffered a life-altering tragedy (such as Tony Quan has) is up to big industry. We believe that the technology that allows people with incredibly limited mobility to create and communicate is prohibitively expensive and inaccessible to those on an average budget.

This story and video prove not only that creativity and technology can be and are in the hands of the masses if we seize the opportunity, but that if we dream big and cooperate, we’re hampered only by the limit of our imaginations.

Community Connection

Is the world slated against those with disabilities? Are you interested in the hardships facing the disabled traveler? Hop on over to Brave New Traveler and read Julie Schwietert Collazo’s article about the subject.

What do you think about open source software that improves people’s lives? Share your opinions below.

Photo: dmuth, Feature Photo: jim orsini

While this may seem innocent enough, a warped mind can come up with a myriad of sadistic games that might be played out in a show of humiliating hamster play to say nothing of whether or not a Volkswagen sized replica of a rectum will be made available upon request for “Gere Style” suffocation play.

Ottawa Citizen reports that the hotel in Nantes, France is owned by Frederic Tabary and Yann Falquerho who run a company specializing in the rental of unusual locations. They quote Falquerho as saying, “The Hamster in the world of children is that little cuddly animal. Often, the adults who come here have wanted or did have hamsters when they were small.”

The article further states this comment was uttered from inside a hamster costume, and I have no doubt that our dear Yann has graduated far beyond the “world of children.” Or let’s at least pray that he has.

The truth is, now that the hamster’s out of the bag, furries on European vacations will surely be packing their best rodent costumes to spend a night in the Hamster Hotel. Cruel masters will be driving their slaves as fast as their dirty little paws can carry them on the wheel, and men who were once terrified little boys seeing their female pet eating her young before their very eyes can reenact the trauma as they are tortured in their hamster costumes.

Get ready to play pretend!

Community Connection

Can’t get enough weird stuff? Read about the 18 weirdest travel jobs worldwide, or Snake Massages & Bull Semen: World’s Weirdest Spas, and as always, we look forward to reading your comments below.

Photo and Feature Photo: joeltelling

Photo: brad_holt

Specials will vary from day to day beginning in February 2010 with some unlimited and constant choices, among them carrots and celery and use of the soda fountain. You might need to cash in your your “three free drink passes” to truly enjoy such daily offerings as “Ball Park hot dogs and chili,” or charbroiled meatballs with barbecue sauce, but you can’t beat the price.

The 5:30 Kickback menu brags:
“A good hot dog is a profound experience. Lives will be changed, have already been changed, by the Drury frank.”
— Thomas Jenks, entrepreneur

If you don’t have a cast iron stomach, I have no doubt that this will be the case for you.

While many businesses have used the economic crisis to gouge their customers in secret and insidious ways, it appears that Drury Hotels have made a point of going back to good old customer service values by enticing us with something we all like: free food.

Let’s hope that other businesses that rely on our tourism dollars will come to the same conclusion. You catch more flies with three free margaritas a night than with a poorly stocked, loudly humming soda machine.

Moustache Ride Photos: mrflip Feature Photo: matthewspiel

Mo is for moustache. You can register here to get sponsored to grow your own for Movember.

What is Movember?

Movember is the month for you to put away your razor to raise awareness for prostate cancer, and if you’ve watched the above video, kick some ass. Anytime someone remarks on your new whiskers, you can open a door to conversation about the cause. Join as part of a team or by yourself. You’ve still got time.

In South Africa, New Zealand, Europe, the US, and Canada there are officially sanctioned costume parties and events and you can apply to host your own party. Participants dress for the moustache they’ve grown. Pirate? Motorcycle cop? Luigi? Moustache Ride, perhaps? Just because Halloween is over does not mean you need to give up costume parties for the year.

No matter where you are in the world, you can still raise awareness for the cause and, if you’re testosterone endowed, grow a moustache yourself. Check it out on Facebook and watch the summary video below.

Community Connection

All about raising awareness for cancer? Check out this piece about raising breast cancer awareness.

Just because it’s not getting screwed doesn’t mean it’s not up for a good bang, eh?

Community Connection

Interested in wine? Check out Nicole Heyman’s piece on MatadorTrips about Malbec Country in Argentina or Matador Member karenke4’s blog about wine in Canada.

This and All Photos: Kate Sedgwick

What the Pepsi Music Festival in Buenos Aires calls “fan space” is an area in front of a stage that is at least ten feet off the ground, and what it amounts to if you’re all of five feet tall (like I am) is that you won’t be seeing much of any of the musicians you came to see below knee level.

It means their torsos will often seem to hover, cut off by the blackness of the stage. To be in the special area will mean that the little view you have will be blocked by massive cameras and their operators as they simulcast choppy close ups that pan in and out like children playing with a zoom lens for the first time.

Despite being herded into an overpriced “fan” corral, the privilege of which I paid extra for, I so thoroughly enjoyed Faith No More’s performance November 1st, 2009 that I am having trouble defining it. While I was not able to see very much of what was happening on stage, I was there more to hear the band than to see them and they delivered in a big way.

The only view I ever got of Drummer Mike Bordin
was on the big screen.

I’ve been a fan since my sophomore year of high school. At that time, FNM’s sound made me sick. It made me nervous. It touched a part of me I didn’t know I had and there seemed to be answers to mysterious questions in the dissonance, lyrics, and syncopation on Angel Dust. I hadn’t heard anything quite like them and I still haven’t. I tortured myself with that record, listening to it over and over even though it scared me, until I crawled into that sound and identified with it.

Though their style changed a lot with the two subsequent albums (King for a Day and Album of the Year) at least partially because each had a different guitarist (Trey Spruance and and Jon Hudson respectively), Faith No More sounds like no other band. Metal? Lounge? Rock? Country? Spaz core? Noise? Easy listening? Punk?

Rabid fans go insane in Buenos Aires. Shows here are just more fun.

Yes. All of the above. And though their sound is hard to pigeonhole, they are immediately recognizable in no small part due to Patton’s vocals that range from leading-man smooth to larynx shredding shrieks and barks.

Keyboardist Roddy Bottum, Singer Mike Patton and Bassist Billy Gould.

I saw them once before in 1995 on the King for a Day Tour when they made their way to Louisville, KY. That show was much smaller, I was right up front and though the venue and show were different, the truth about FNM is that the band is tight, disciplined, and incredibly skilled. At that show Patton ripped out the back of his pants when he crouched to let loose a note from the bowels of hell (or at least his own). Unfazed, the show continued with periodic flashes of the singer’s red underwear.

Patton donned a #10 soccer jersey for the encore,
drawing a parallel between himself and Argentine soccer legend
Maradona. Was it a joke? Maybe.

It broke my heart when they split up. Though I have followed solo projects by members since then, I enjoy them as a team. Seeing them play was an emotional experience for me. Even if they’re in it for the money, each of them gives themselves up to the show and the music and that’s what we’re all there for.

While being in South America often has me missing bands touring the US and Europe, this time, it’s the kids in the USA who are missing tour dates for the freshly reunited band who seems to be following Summer around the world starting in Europe and coming this way for the hot weather. Those of you reading this – if they tour the US you’d be an idiot not to go. Faith No More is as good or better than they ever were (though I have to say that I miss Jim Martin’s guitar).

If you haven’t seen a big rock show in Buenos Aires, you’re missing out. The fans here are practically rabid in their enthusiasm. No one is too cool to dance and so if you’re used to American fans who seem to want to be caught in a sexy pose if the hot guitarist happens to look their way, fans in Argentina give as much as the bands and in some cases, more.

Patton remarked on the crowd’s preference for singing the guitar and keyboard parts. We were a wall of sound that could be heard through floor monitors and amplifiers. This was a show I will not soon forget. The following are the first three numbers. Enjoy!

Community Connection

Are you a freak for Faith No More like the author? Has one of your favorite bands ever come to your neck of the woods? Do you find rock concerts in Buenos Aires to be a bit too much? Let us know about it in the comments field below.

Taking the trend of treating the family dog like one of the family to its logical end, let no one be left out for Halloween.

Is it a pilgrim? Is it a witch? This Boston’s in the Halloween spirit whichever the case may be. Photo: Don Hankins

Halloween it is. Yoda I am. Photo: Foxtongue

It not a weimaraner, it’s a wiener wiener. Photo: robotpolisher

Mockstar’s caption is “Poodle in a poodle skirt,” and I can’t top that. Photo: mockstar

Hound of Hell Photo: r0sss

A hot dog with relish and mustard who seems to ask, “What have I done to deserve this?” Photo: TineyHo

Precious Moments Cocker Spaniel Photo: mikebaird

Now the world is ready for you and the wonders you can do, Wonder Dog! Photo: akaporn

Lucifer Dog Photo: TheGiantVemin

Poor Raggedy Andy. Photo and Feature Photo: akaporn

Holy fuzz-balls, Bat Man! Photo: akaporn

Spider Puppy skitters along. Photo: akaporn

Free from the tank, it’s Lobster Dog. Photo: akaporn

Striking a dashing figure – if Lady is a trap, this dog’s a gentleman. Photo: Ingorrr

Community Connection

Interested in the full participation of your pup in all aspects of life including travel? Check out these tips for taking your dog on the road.

Does this post make you miss your pet back home? Check out this piece with four tips for remembering your familiar while in transit.

Is this the tip of the iceberg in dog costumery? Is it animal cruelty or pageantry at its finest? Let us know what you think in the comments below!

Photo: dontcallmeikke, Feature Photo: expecting t0 fly

Only a society hell-bent on the instant satisfaction of its basest needs at rock bottom prices could possibly generate the cuisine that follows. Don’t blame other countries for their love-hate relationship with the country that brings addictive, disgusting foods to their cities that both repulse and attract.

They know it’s disgusting and so do you.

I agree with Patton Oswalt that these are one step away from food in a squeezable tube or eating from a trough. KFC layers cheese on gravy on starch upon starch and tops it off with some chicken that is half its weight in deep fried chemical laden breading.

Photo: shareski

The best part? It can all be shoveled in with a plastic spoon. No time need be lost manually cutting one piece from another, and you can forget about all that pesky chewing – the only part you’ll need teeth for is the chicken, the rest can literally be sucked down. Mmmm-mmmmm! 720 calories of nearly drinkable goodness!

If you want to get freaked out about fast food, look no further than the McRib. Food Facts will tell you more than you ever wanted to know about something you probably should never have put in your mouth. We know it’s not the first time, but in this case, there’s documentation. “Boneless pork” is the primary ingredient in the McRib sandwich patty – a “boneless pork” sandwich meant to look like ribs in much the same way a Fisher Price hamburger looks like a hamburger.

Photo: jluster Drink in the plastic pallor of the “meat”.

This substance sounds edible, but remember that cartilage is not bone, nor are anuses, lips, intestines or eyeballs. In this case “boneless pork” could be just about anything from the pig with no bone. Food facts shows the inside of one of these babies and the texture of the gray “meat” close up showing its particle board texture beneath a blistery surface of “skin”. At 490 calories, I have seen dogs turn their nose up at a piece of McRib.

McDonalds takes it off the menu and then puts it back on promoting its availability much in the same way the Rolling Stones promote their geriatric selves – “It’s back.” I guess we’ve all forgotten the hauntingly similar catchphrase from Poltergeist II.

Photo generously provided by: GrubGrade.com

Much like a “Bowl” from KFC, this half-pound item from Taco Bell does not require any silverware. Simply slurp down deep fried potatoes with the Bell’s signature seasoned colonic spasm initiator (ground beef), nacho “cheese”, and reduced fat sour cream. It’s important when inhaling half a pound (510 calories or 680, depending on your source) of non-nutrients that the sour cream be reduced fat.

I’m not sure that I need to say any more. I think this photo from Grub Grade speaks volumes.

You can thank White Castle for this absolutely appalling name for a sandwich. Apparently the launch of this product was unfortunately timed, coinciding with a major outbreak of the swine flu and I am unable to find any evidence of its current availability. This probably foreshadows a re-release in the style of McRib.

The slogan for this aptly named “sandwich”?
Sweet. Saucy. Oh so naughty.
Um. I wasn’t planning on having intercourse with it.

Pulled. Pork. Slider. Masturbation. Lubrication. Greasy things “sliding” – in or out – we don’t know – both, I guess. Like every other fast food chain, White Castle counts on our sexual desires being sublimated by engineered food that we can stuff our faces with without having any person to person exchange beyond the question, “Would you like fries with that?” and the possibility that flesh will touch flesh as change is passed through a window. Ever available, it’s hot and ready for you. In one hole and out the other.

Witness the wormlike texture of the pork. It kind of makes you wonder what it was pulled from, doesn’t it? If this is the approved propaganda, we can only imagine the heinousness that the real sandwich would be. Worse than anything a grim, hairnet wearing school lunch lady could unceremoniously ladle onto your tray for sloppy joe day with a wet plop, imagine yourself gleefully and drunkenly devouring these in your car by the dozen and keep your fingers crossed that their return is nigh.

How do you make one of mankind’s greasiest and least healthy foods less healthy than it already is? Form it into balls and deep-fry it, coat it with sugar and serve it with frosting. What evil empire could devise such a horrible and unhealthy food? Hardee’s. Just when you thought that biscuits and sausage gravy were the pinnacle of non-nutritive breakfast foods, Hardee’s launches an ad campaign to grab your attention.

How many times can you hear “a hole” and not look at the TV?

While you may actually be eating “a holes” when you’re dining on a McRib, Hardee’s wants you thinking of “a holes” while you dip your balls into white cream that you bought in a six-pack. In this way, the homoeroticism of eating cream covered “a holes” shaped like balls can be brought back to the heartland in a non-threatening way. How many orders do you think Larry Craig has swallowed? Way to go, Hardee’s.

Count the seven beef patties that make the Windows 7 Whopper.

Japan.

This burger is the equivalent to seven quarter pounders at 1.74 lbs. If what Gizmodo has to say about Windows 7 is true, the new OS will make things go more smoothly on your computer in inverse correlation to what the Whopper 7 will be doing to your arteries and intestines.

Below, see Cheapy D from CheapassGamer.com as he does battle with the behemoth burger. According to the video, the burger goes for about $14 US. As Cheapy D states of his rendevouz with this artery clogger during the Window 7 launch party, “We’re gonna be having our own launch party as soon as we’re done with this.” You need to see this if only to see the real burger in comparison to everyday objects, like people’s heads.

Enjoy!

Community Connection

If this burger makes you feel like a size queen, check out Whopper Virgins: How Burger King Looks at People Worldwide on Brave New Traveler.

And please, if you’re virgin to neither Windows 7 or the huge Whopper above, we’d love to see your comments below!

Your perspective is wanted here. Photo and Feature Photo: Joshua Rappeneker

While we like to know why good things are good, we also revel in the sour, the acerbic, the witty, and the cutting.

If you’re getting tired of people jokingly saying to you, “Yeah! But tell us what you really think,” then you should probably consider submitting something to us.

-Do I have stories about shows, concerts, festivals, restaurants, clubs, meals, or drunken escapades wherein the story is heavily reliant on place?

-Are these my go-to stories that I tell new people to get to know them and in order that they can get to know me?

-Do people laugh at these stories?

If you answered yes to the preceding questions, we are looking for your stories.

Tell the truth.

Let it all hang out.

Laugh at yourself and others.

You may contact me directly with pitches at kate [at] matadornetwork [dot] com. I will be reading for thoughtful presentation. Do your best. Put “I submit!” in the subject line so I know you read this.

Thank you for your attention,

Kate Sedgwick

Like this.

If you can’t stand the misery, I suggest skipping ahead the the three minute mark.

Community Connection

Want to read more about the hazards of drinking? Check out Eva Holland’s article World’s Worst Spot for a DUI or check out the Matador Community’s tips to cure your hangover.

Diners seated on decorative toilet seat lids at Modern Toilet Restaurant
This and all Photos Courtesy of Arman Rin, Jr.

With 13 locations in Taiwan and growing, perhaps acknowledging the end point of the food’s trip through our internal water slides (even as it’s being eaten) is an idea whose time has come.

Tables are sinks replete with drain holes (above and left). One hardly knows whether to call this space (lower right) a booth or a stall.

You might think it’s avant garde, but the site says, “In an age where creative marketing is king, even feces can be turned into gold!” betraying what seems to be a purely commercial impetus for a theme that could pass for modern art. Were the toilet seats attached to plumbing, one could imagine world records being made while patrons competed to remain just where they were, processing their meals on the spot.

Chopsticks sport a toilet demanding a kiss (above and right). Delectable bowlful of food presented in a yellow toilet (bottom).

Perhaps it’s a testament to the strength of the cuisine that customers don’t lose their appetites, but the kitsch decor sublimates the in-your-faceness of a bathroom themed restaurant. Far from being scummy or intimidating, Modern Bathroom Restaurants bristle with cleanliness. A look at the website’s locations page shows variety in the design of each branch.

The website chronicles the chain’s story. The Modern Toilet legend began where all great ideas begin – on the porcelain throne. The unnamed soon-to-be-entrepreneur was struck by inspiration and soon opened the first location under the demure name ‘Marton Restaurant’. Serving only desserts with a decidedly fecal look turned out to be more exciting to the general public than it may have been presumed to be, and soon Modern Toilet was born (don’t ask from which orifice and we won’t either).

The signature ice cream served in a mini-urinal (top). A “fountain” drink to give Duchamp a run for his money (lower left). Deep-fried goodies served in a tiny bathtub (below, right).

There are vegetarian selections on the menu, and the website’s interactive message board means you can make your own reservation or maybe even steal someone else’s.

From the contact page:

Eating ice cream shaped like pooh
While sitting on the toilet!
Sounds twisted? You bet!
How about toilets everywhere you look
while you eat?
Believe it or not, plenty of people have
tried it – and enjoyed it!
When it comes to Toilet Ice Cream,
Many have heard of it, but few dare to try it.
After all, it sounded like crap, and looked like it too.
This changed when the Modern Toilet Restaurant
Opened in Kaohsiung City.
Lively atmosphere, spotless environment
We make it fun to eat ice cream from the toilet!

So take a seat anywhere you like. You can see there are a variety to choose from.

Special thanks to Arman Rin, Jr. for letting us use his awesome photographs!

“A good place to let yourself go” is an original slogan of Modern Toilet Restaurant.

Community Connection

Just have to know more about Modern Toilet? You’re in luck.
Check out Eva Holland’s piece on Matador Pulse or read a first hand account by Robing Esrock on Brave New Traveler.

Photo and Feature Photo: jenny downing

The two bullies had been caught on tape assaulting several less ornately dressed men before they got their comeuppance at the hands of some well-muscled guys in miniskirts. As handily as it would have occurred in a John Waters movie, the two assailants were laid out on the sidewalk, one of them kicked a couple times for good measure.

It’s at about a minute in when the two trouble makers spot who they believe will be their next victims.

The ass-kicking was handled so proficiently that The Sun speculates the high-heeled-heros were cage fighters en route from a costume party, though the bad-asses in question who stopped the two drunkards from further menacing passers-by that evening were never traced. You can view the video with The Sun’s commentary at the page.

While The Sun may not know it, those who cross-dress publicly are tougher than your average person. They have to be. Though the mystery girls will likely never be identified, I raise a glass to these heroes of the night and ask, “Wouldn’t it be great if every city had a marauding band of transexuals to defend its citizenry from drunken menaces?”

Photo: Incase Designs, Feature Photo: Avoir Chaud

Photo: gloomfairie52

Gearing up for the event, the Canadian born, 28-year-old designer decided to add plus sized models to his showcase and two of his employees were apparently so upset by this that they quit.

I am so curious about the rationale behind these walk-outs that I must speculate as to the frame of mind of these people.

Were the following sentences uttered or thought?

“I must stand on my principles, and so even if it means I’m out of a job, I must stick to my low-IQ-stoner-surfer guns and say, ‘No fat chicks.’”

“I won’t have my name associated with a designer who would stoop to such a level as to let women who don’t spend a quarter of their lives vomiting walk the runway. It shows a lack of commitment to true fashion.”

“Models that take modeling seriously commit to torturous regimens of drug use and starvation. To allow women who don’t ascribe to these basic principles shows a lack of regard for professionalism and reflects poorly on me.”

I would really like to have a look at these quitters to better speculate on whether or not they have eating disorders themselves. Maybe they’re size 12-14s and are blind with jealousy thinking of the modeling careers they missed out on.

In any case, a quick look at the original Daily Mail article reveals photos of models who are considered plus sized, but are not fat by any stretch of the imagination.

This move on the part of Mark Fast has likely brought publicity and new clientele to his fashion label, and I wonder what it’s brought to the two crew members who are running scared.

Community Connection

Interested in fashion? Check out this article from Julie Schwietert on Mizrahi’s salmon skin dress from Matador Change.

Think there;s a place for plus sized models in the world of high fashion? Share your opinions in the comments field below!

Photo: bill shouldis

Though Attica! Attica! has a sound that runs the gamut, one consistency aside from the emotionally moving and raw vocals of Aaron Scott are lyrics geared toward exposing a greater truth, be it emotional or societal. Scott is a visionary musician with an aesthetic geared toward making a difference.

Scott won’t be going it alone on the Ditch the Van Tour. He says, “I’m the only permanent member of the band. It’s essentially a solo act where my friends join me sometimes.” Backing up his vocals, acoustic guitar, and piano playing will be Blake Jenssen, erstwhile tour manager and mechanic on acoustic guitar, and Jon Olek, also on acoustic guitar and filling in as roadie and jokester in between shows.

Attica! Attica! on MySpace, where you can hear a couple songs for free: myspace.com/atticaattica

Attica! Attica!’s official website, where you can download the new album Napalm & Nitrogen for free: atticaattica.org

Dead Skin Dried Blood, the band’s first record available for purchase here or in iTunes:
Dead Skin Dried Blood

The Ditch the Van Tour blog for tour dates and more: ditchthevan.blogspot.com

Attica! Attica!’s World Bicycle Relief team donation page where you can donate to the cause:
grassroots.kintera.org
_______________________________________________________________

Scott’s busy schedule gearing up for the tour could easily have prevented this interview from happening, but he took some time to tell MatadorNights a little about himself, his music and the upcoming tour.

MN: Where do you live?

AS: I live in Portland, OR, USA. Portland gets a lot of attention in the American press for being the bike mecca of the United States. We’re proud of that reputation, but we also know that we have a long way to go to match the ridership and cycling infrastructure of many places in Europe, for example.

It’s also important to acknowledge that it’s fairly easy to have an impressive cycling reputation in a nation like the US where such a high percentage of the population can afford cars. A majority of Americans still disdain cycling, finding it pointless, irritating, dangerous, or too difficult.

The Ditch the Van Tour is focused just as much on advocating for cycling to an American audience as it is on providing bicycles to disaster-stricken communities.

MN: World Bicycle Relief supplies bikes for those in poverty and those affected by disaster. While many might think that bikes are frivolous, can you describe ways that they improve quality of life for people?

AS: If you have a car or live in a place with decent public transportation, then perhaps you could think a bike is frivolous. But in developing countries, a bicycle can dramatically improve a person’s life. The more mobile a person can be, the more easily that person can access education, healthcare, job opportunities, and general goods and services.

This is true anywhere in the world. And if your only transportation is walking, then a bicycle allows you to go farther, exert less effort, carry more, and save time.

If you have to travel 10 miles a day, would you rather walk for 4 hours or bike for 1 hour? And if anyone out there truly thinks that cycling is frivolous in developed countries, just look at the cloud of smog above any major city and then tell me how that’s going to go away without the help of bicycles.

MN: Your lyrics are socially conscious and and now you’re going on a benefit tour. It seems you’re into music for more than music’s sake. Would you care to elaborate on that?

AS: I like a good love song I suppose, but the music I value most explores ideas that matter on a larger scale. When I was growing up, I always had food, good healthcare, a place to sleep, and people who cared about me.

While that seemed normal at the time, I found out as a teenager that living conditions throughout the world vary dramatically. I felt somewhat guilty that the lottery of life had made my childhood so easy, but I think I was also naturally drawn to matters of human rights, for whatever reason.

Photo and Feature Photo of Aaron Scott: Ricardo Saporta

It was around this time that I started listening to punk music, and I was enthralled by both the aggression and the lyrics condemning the establishment. That seemed much more interesting to me than country musicians blindly cheerleading for the government or pop singers whining about their latest breakup.

So when I started writing music, I wrote about social justice. I can’t say that it’s part of any mission, especially since I do write some songs that are more introspective. But I’m interested in working towards social justice in all aspects of my life, so it makes sense to combine the two whenever possible.

MN: Have you heard of Blind Pilot and their bike tour?

AS: Once I committed to doing this tour and began talking about it, several people clued me in to Blind Pilot’s bike touring. A handful of performers have done something like this in the past, but it is still rare enough that many people have never heard of anything like it.

I had a chance to speak with Ryan from Blind Pilot, and his advice was to just enjoy it as much as possible and not worry too much about itinerary and promotion. Of course, this is hard for me because I like plans and I like talking about myself. And I also feel it’s important to work hard to get the word out.

The more people know about it, the more people will think about cycling’s possibilities, and the more money we will raise for World Bicycle Relief.

MN: Where did the name Attica! Attica! come from?

AS: I borrowed the name from an old 70’s protest chant. In 1971, a prison riot erupted in Attica State Penitentiary in upstate New York. There is a rich history to this story that deserves a better retelling, but here’s the brief summary:

Though the riot was spontaneous, it was somewhat in response to the particularly dehumanizing conditions for inmates at Attica. As a result of the riot, the inmates took control of a significant part of the prison and took many of the prison guards hostage.

After a four day standoff where the inmates and the state tried to reach a resolution, the state lost patience and attacked the prison yard with tear gas and guns, leaving 28 inmates and 9 hostages dead. The state then spread misinformation, blaming the hostage deaths on the inmates and bulldozing much of the evidence.

As a result, “Attica!” became a chant that was popular whenever activists witnessed an overly violent state response, such as police brutality. I thought it was a fitting name to accompany my interest in social issues, and I also liked the connection to upstate New York, where I was living at the time.

MN: Your sound varies from pop punk to emotional piano ballads, but the message seems to be about solidarity with the underdog in nearly every case.

Scott and his Bike

AS: An easy way to make a song more interesting is to give it unexpected lyrics. There aren’t many piano ballads out there that discuss creating community by causing a blackout. And I like to cover a range of topics, but the underdog is a certainly common theme for me. To be clear, the underdogs I’m singing about usually have higher stakes than just being the unlikely winner of a football match.

MN: Do you believe it’s the artist’s responsibility to raise awareness of societal problems?

AS: I don’t believe the onus is on artists anymore than it should be on any other group of people. It is everyone’s responsibility to educate ourselves about social injustice, and it is our obligation as global citizens to try to make the world around us better, whether that is locally or globally.

Music is a powerful vehicle for raising awareness of these issues, but it can also be beautiful for the sake of beauty. I’m much more interested in whether a person is trying to improve their surroundings at all than if they are specifically using music for that cause.

MN: Do your favorite bands seem to follow these lines as well?

AS: Absolutely. I loved punk music as a teenager exactly for this reason. I particularly respect artists like Midnight Oil and Billy Bragg, who have used what is essentially pop music to promote social justice. My favorite band has always been Bad Religion because of their ability to make catchy, energetic music that doesn’t sacrifice the intelligence of the message for the sake of the music.

MN: Do you have recommendations for other socially conscious bands that rock?

AS: Don’t dilute your message in an attempt to be more accessible. Your social consciousness makes you unique in a crowd of musicians who are singing about much less interesting subject matter. Bands like Rage Against the Machine and System of a Down have done very well singing about politics; you can too.

MN: Ha ha! That’s not what I meant, but I like the question you answered better than the question I meant to ask, so let’s move on.

This is a threefold do-gooder tour. You are being green by touring on bikes with awareness raising music to benefit charity. This is really inspirational. For those who are looking for inspiration in their quest to change the world for the better, what do you have to say?

AS: For me, it has been essential to find methods of working for change that I find both invigorating and effective. I used to go to huge rallies and protests and felt lost in the large crowds, then got frustrated at how the media would misportray the event, rendering the entire effort toothless.

I eventually realized that I need to have more agency in my efforts, otherwise I would just stop trying altogether. This bike tour is just the latest iteration of my personal activism, and it emerged from trying many other forms of action and finding out they were not for me. All I can say is that you don’t need the power of a million people to make a change. That said, it doesn’t hurt, either.

MN: How are you preparing for the trip? Did you have to quit your job? How else are you preparing to put your day to day life on hold?

AS: Ideally, I would’ve spent the last month riding my bike a lot. Instead, I’ve been working overtime to save money, running around like a madman to get all the gear I need, and recording my new record.

Since we’re giving all the door money to World Bicycle Relief and we won’t be able to take any merch with us, I needed another way to make money while I’m gone. My record is going to be available digitally for donation, which is something I’ve never done before. It’s unclear how many people donate in those situations, but I’d rather people hear my music for free than not hear it at all.

My job just ended because it was seasonal, and I don’t have anything lined up for when I return. Portland has the second highest unemployment rate in the US, so that’s a little scary.

But as far as putting my life on hold, I like to think that traveling like this is quite the opposite. If my life has ever been on hold, it has been during the times when I was working a job I didn’t like or I wasn’t experiencing anything new. Jobs and places to live will always be available as long as I’m willing to be patient enough to find them.

Riding my bike for 10 weeks, meeting new people, singing songs around campfires, sleeping in the woods, and making a few friends along the way? Now that’s living.

Community Connection:

Into biking? Be sure to check out our picks for The World’s 15 Most Bike Friendly Cities, as well as our recent article about what steps to take towards successful self-supported bicycle tours.

Photo and Feature Photo: seier+seier+seier

From Variety’s Ali Jafar:

While Iranian cinema was preoccupied for much of the 1980s and 1990s with symbolism and allegorically cherubic children, the Iranian pics at Venice this year deal directly with the social upheaval in the country both preceding and following June’s presidential elections.

There are at least two women directors out of Iran this year at the festival,Hana Makhmalbaf and Shirin Neshat. Shirin Neshat’s debut “Women Without Men” is set in the early ’50’s during an American government sponsored upheaval and traces the lives of four women seeking personal peace in the time leading up to the revolution of 1979.

In the Variety article, Neshat says of the film and her work:

It’s important for Western audiences to know about the events of 1953 and how that led to the 1979 revolution and the events we saw in June.

We are seeing history repeating itself, only the players have changed. Instead of the shah we now have supreme leader Ali Khamenei and Mahmoud Ahmedinejad.

What is the same is seeing the Iranian people trying to free themselves from attempts to take away their liberty.

Hana Makhmalbaf’s docudrama “Green Days” mixes actual and staged footage to create a portrait of a woman in the aftermath of Iran’s most recent elections. The director is just 21 years old.

The other film mentioned in the article is Nader Takmil Homayoun’s “Tehroun.” Homayoun splits his time between France and Iran and his film exposes a seedy underbelly in a statement about the disenfranchised youth of the country.

These films were created very quickly, but if these selections are any indication, we should be seeing some strong films coming out of Iran in years to come with a new perspective of world politics informing filmmakers’ sensibilities.

Community Connection

Interested in what else is going on in Iran? Check in with Matador expert Jason Rezaian in this Matador Trips article.

Looking for one or two more reasons to go to Iran to seal the deal in your head? See Jason’s article 7 Reasons To Travel To Iran NOW.

Photo: John Picken, Feature Photo: mfajardo

That’s right. Though Britain’s Home Office still thinks it’s okay if you drink until attacking someone with a pint glass seems like a good idea, apparently glass in the hands of an adult is not.

With tens of thousands of pubs closing their doors permanently each year due to high property costs and what many pub owners see as exhorbitant taxes, the mandate to switch to a less dangerous alternative to the ordinary pint glass is an added cost that may well put more pubs under if implemented, to say nothing of the insult to the intelligence of adults in England and elsewhere.

Photo: takomabibelot

The belief that people should not be held accountable for their own actions is the reason that there are cameras at every corner in the United States and idiotic rules posted at every place of employment.

Western society seems to be of the mind that every business must cover its ass by condescending to its clientele at every turn or risk being sued into nonexistence.

Is this a product of an overly litigious society? Probably – at least in part.

As Carlo Alcos’ most recent piece here on Nights is loathe to blame alcohol for recent upticks in brawls and assaults in Melbourne, we should probably all be looking for answers for increases in violence worldwide in recent years.

If we are feeling the need in larger numbers to go out, get drunk and assault people, we must start looking for societal trends that correlate to our malaise and dissatisfaction rather than simply blaming a substance.

Could it be that we are spending too much time in front of computer and television screens? Perhaps we’re having to work too hard or are feeling alienated from peers and family. Maybe it’s like Kurt Vonnegut explained, and all the dramatic stories we’ve been exposed to throughout our lives have given us a thirst for drama in our own.

Whatever the reasons for increased violence among pubgoers in Britain, Australia and elsewhere, it can’t only be the alcohol and it can’t just be the glass. Maybe we’re all tired of being treated like children?

Community Connection

Check out the Matador Community for user’s stories about pubs, like this reminiscence of community member MattLynch808 about his grandfather’s pub in Australia or nzjosh’s post about the top 3 Dublin beer gardens.

How do you tie one on? Start your own Matador blog and get started telling the Matador Community about it today!

I couldn’t stop laughing. It touched a chord. So often you or I might sing a snippet in the spirit of the literal video, but to do it so seamlessly and for the length of the entire song, well, you have to admit that it takes talent.

Among the many YouTube users now posting their own literal videos, many mention Dusty McNeato whom they credit as being the originator of literal video. Apparently due to copyright laws, the original literal A-Ha video was taken off and in its absence others stepped into its place, including a Dutch version of the same video.

A quick search of Dusty McNeato reveals his personal website and YouTube Channel.

The following are some recent gems of the genre.

It’s easy to hate Total Eclipse of the Heart, the tune that’s mocked at least once a night at any Karaoke throughout the U.S. You’ve been overexposed and are now suffering from Eclipse poisoning. Never fear. Get your mock on with this critical and observational jewel of snark and goofiness.

I added this one simply because, though the singing is far from convincing, the lyrics are true to the form and though I think we’ve all been Rick-Rolled, I don’t know that more than a handful of us have been literally Rick-Rolled. Perhaps Rick-Rolling has had its day, but if you want to surprise someone with some Rick, I think this is the way it must be done hence forth.

Photo: lightmatter, Feature Photo: iversonic

This year, they’re sharing a space with Pandora’s Fix-it Shoppe & Dream Lounge at 6:00 and DNA. They’re also home to the Digital Vagabond and the first batch of Roads Scholars and their graduation ceremony.

Camp Nomadia hosts the Technomadic Lifestyle Workshop on Thursday from 3:00-4:00 in which they share with you “how to live, work and play full time on the road. From picking your ideal mobile arsenal, finding location independent professions to the logistics of handling taxes, mail and more.”

Though Burning Man is about happenstance, coincidence and serendipity, there can be nothing wrong with pushing things in the right direction by deliberately meeting some people to help you put your dreams in motion.

All photos from YouTube video, ITN

According to YouTube:
Gruesome body parts greet customers of a bakery in Ratchaburi, Thailand. Artist and baker Kittiwat Unarrom has sculpted life-like heads, feet and hands from dough in the bakery’s kitchen and exhibits them in glass cabinets in the shop. He says his edible art lures one hundred visitors a day.

Unfortunately the video isn’t subtitled, but according to the blog Shape and Colour,
Unarrom says of the work, “When people see the bread, they don’t want to eat it. But when they taste it, it’s just normal bread. The lesson is: Don’t judge just by outer appearances.”

Unarrom comes from a family of bakers and so the choice of bread as a medium is understandable.

The finished work could be said to demonstrate any number of concepts. The consumption of flesh as a part of culture, the ephemerality of art and life, the knowledge that our bodies will be subsumed by the earth and become fuel for new life – these are just a few that easily come to mind.

Do these special loaves have meaning to you? Do you find them sacrilegious, disgusting, hilarious or especially interesting? Please share your opinion in the comments field below.

Community Connection

Can’t get enough weird foods? Check out Pele Omori’s article 11 Weird Japanese Foods and Nellie Huan’s Dog Meat and Rooster Balls: The 10 Most Exotic Asian Foods.

Feel like whipping up something weird of your own? How about something that requires brains? Check out Tom Gates’ Five Recipes That Require Brains

Photo: bbaunach, Feature Photo: alan(ator)

What started out as sleazy adult fun meant to titillate and generate a little controversy could have unintended consequences as pervs of all stripes use the hotel’s floor to ceiling windows as a way to expose themselves to people of all ages, some still complying with the mandate that they not come within 100 yards of a school.

New York Magazine, along with the New York Post and various other blogs are reporting that visitors to the nearby High Line Park in the quickly gentrifying Meatpacking District in Manahattan are getting an eyeful as guests to the hotel deliberately create sexy spectacles for anyone to see – including families out for an evening stroll.

According to New York Post, visitors to the park have seen people deliberately putting on a show for them including a nude woman jumping on a trampoline and that, “[d]isgusted neighbors say they’ve seen men masturbating, professional porn films being shot and couples engaging in sex in full view of the stunning High Line park path running alongside.”

Community Connection

More interested in High Line Park than ever? Check out Julie Schwietert’s photo essay from its first days.

What do you think of this latest marketing gimmick? Expose your opinions in the comments field below!

Perhaps you’re a weekend warrior with a cast iron stomach who prides yourself on your drinking prowess. Maybe you’ve even spent time perfecting and utilizing a beer bong or impressing your friends with your chugging ability. Let me assure you that you’ve got nothing on this Russian stunt drinking team.

You’d have to be sober do do this. Wouldn’t you?

At just under 10 minutes long, this short addresses many issues, and whether it makes you uncomfortable or makes you laugh or both, it’s sure to make you think.

In a recent interview with the artist, here is what she had to say about the work:

KS: Was this idea specifically inspired by the Inauguration of Obama or was this idea bouncing around prior?

Blanche (played by Swisher) confronts her partner
with a revelation.

PS: The idea for “Blanche is the New Black” was specifically inspired by the Inauguration, although I had been wanting to do something on the issue of race for a while. I actually went to a mostly black club that night and was the only white girl there, and had a total blast. Everyone was so happy and accepting. Then, the idea came to me.

KS: What was your reaction when you heard people saying “Racism is over in America?”

PS: I thought it was a total farce that the media was saying “Racism is over” because of Obama. If anything, his election brought out the racism in so many people. Blanche is an example of someone who accepts the President being black, but is oblivious to her own conditioned, stereotypical views of black people.

KS: Your role could be seen as pretty embarrassing. Do you feel like you showed your ass? If not, whose ass(es) did you show?

PS: Haha! I didn’t think it was embarrassing at all. It was a lot of fun. I actually really like the character of Blanche. You have to in order to laugh at her ridiculousness. She is a part of me, just as the other characters are a part of me, but she is definitely the most absurd, and I exaggerated that absurdity. On election night, I remember thinking to myself, “Wow, I can’t believe all these black people actually like me!” which, if you think about it, is pretty silly.

So, in that sense, I do feel like I showed my ass, but it was because I mooned you.

KS: This is a piece that plays on “coming out.” Your character is partnered with a woman, though there is no direct commentary about that in the movie, and the other characters accept the relationship (and lots of other stuff) without commenting on it directly. Are you speaking to gay activism and gay civil rights with this piece?

Blanche tries her new identity on for size in a local bar.

PS: I am, in a way. I would love to have my homosexuality simply accepted. I think it is a topic that needs to be explored, and in the revised “Blanche is the New Black” it is addressed. But, for the YouTube version, I thought it would be new and fresh to just have the gay issue moved into a space where it really isn’t that big of a deal, as I hope it will be. My life is filled with black and white people who are supportive of ALL civil rights. It is the little person and the transgender who really need civil rights activism. Now, THAT is a parade or march that I would like to add to the list.

KS: I laughed pretty hard when I watched this. I think the piece is pretty brave. It could be taken the wrong way. If someone says this piece is racist, how would you react?

PS: So far, that hasn’t happened yet. And you never know how you are going to react to something, but I would probably say something about how humor is my favorite way to bring difficult issues up.

Pam’s current goal is to get ‘Blanche is the New Black’ seen in all 50 States, so leave some comments at her YouTube channel and let her know where you are. I’m sure that other countries are an extra bonus.

Community Connection

Interested in reading thoughts of everyday people on racism? Check out the links in this post on International Blog Against Racism Week.

What do you think about Blanche is the New Black? Share your opinions to generate conversation as a comment below.

Photo: ranoush

It’s not ordinarily associated with fashion or with freedom, but consider the recent case in France in which Sarkozy intimated that they ought to be banned, and you simply must consider that they are a form of self expression that Muslim women are entitled to.

Enter HijabsHigh.com, a site that celebrates hijabs worn fashionably, colorfully, and worldwide.

I’d quote the author of the site, but it’s better if you see for yourself the way HijabsHigh celebrates the garment as worn in public all over the world.

Feature Photo by khashi. Title here is the subtitle of the site.

Community Connection

Interested in reading more about hijabs? What about travel to the Middle East? Check out French Canadian Matador Member Sirithturwen’s blog “A Diary Five Years in the Making” about her trip to Iran and the sequel in which she details wardrobe musts for the female traveler.

Is there a better time than summer to get out for a backyard barbecue?

Is there any better company than fellow travelers armed with accounts from all over the world, like those of us from Matador or our friends at Sosauce?

Noted travel writers and bloggers will be rubbing elbows with the likes of, well, you!

Get the scoop on how to travel the world and write about it, or just join us and try your hand at winning some prizes to make packing for your next trip abroad a little more gentle on the budget.

BYOB or L to loosen the tongue and enjoy the smooth sounds of DJ Brian Blackout at The Green Garden in Brooklyn.

The Greene Garden, Brooklyn, NYC

When? – Thursday, August 6th at 5:00 P.M.
Where? – The Greene Garden – 2 S. Portland Ave., Ft. Greene, Brooklyn
How Much? – Free! But you must RSVP to alisha [at] sosauce [dot] com by August 3rd.
Why? – Because we like you.
More Info? – Why, certainly. Please click the links below.
Sosauce Blog
Sosauce Journal
LinkedIn Event
Facebook Event

Photo a guy with a big, foamy cup of chicha: olliethebastard

Chicha is traditionally made by wetting maize with the maker’s saliva in order to kick off the fermentation process. Matador’s own Sarah Menkedick has this to say about the corn based, low alcohol content drink found in various forms throughout Central and South America:

Chicha is intense–I drank some in Bolivia. Let me just say that it takes some psychological preparation to take down a fermented corn beverage that has been chewed up and spit out. I think that’s why I can pretty much eat anything now–that broke down the last critical barrier of fear/resistance I might’ve had.

There’s one way not to skip your vegetables. Photo: mahalie

If you thought the Germans were gross in the drinks department when you tried Jaegermeister, this is definitely not for you. If, however you were looking for a secret ingredient to spice up your Breakfast of Champions, The Bloody Mary, you might want to look into Cynar.

Made in Italy, popular in Germany, it’s said to be good for you, so it mustn’t be very tasty.

According to a Nate Cavalieri in his SF Weekly article on Fernet, it tastes like “licorice flavored Listerine.” If that doesn’t deter you, Fernet Branca, widely imbibed in Argentina and Italy is said to have medicinal properites.

The website says its recipe is a carefully guarded blend of 27 herbs from four continents. One might argue that their very distance from one another in the natural world argues against their ever coming together. ‘Round Buenos Aires way, it’s drunk with cola.

Photo: ~Twon~

Kombucha is said to have its origins in the Orient, but that’s probably because trying to market a tea spawned from a bacteria colony of Russian pedigree as a digestive remedy might be a hard sell. Russian bacteria tea remedy just doesn’t have a very “holistic healing” ring to it, does it?

Made by adding bacteria spoors to sugared tea and letting nature take its course, Kombucha is said to boost the immune system and liver function. Be careful if you’re planning on spawning your own. Contamination during the fermentation process has led to poisonings.

Photo from the midst of a Airag drinking contest: xfce

Airag is fermented horse milk that has its origins in Mongolia. This is just one of a number of fermented milk drinks. You can find Mageu in South Africa, Turks drink Kumis, and the Russians have Kefir. Not to be confused with Turkey’s Ayran, which has a yogurt base, Airag has a mild alcohol content and is said to be good for digestion.

Described by those who haven’t grown up with it as “milk with a kick” and “vomit inducing,” it seems more like a digestion preventative than a digestion aide. I guess if it can make it through the pipes – what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, eh?

Feature Photo of an international drinks exchange: morrissey

What happens when minimum wage meets Hollywood? Yargh! I think I’ve got a clue.
Photo: candycanedisco

The other night I was out for an otherwise lovely dinner in a Peruvian restaurant in the Once neighborhood here in Buenos Aires. When my initial order for a diet drink was declined due to diminished supply, I looked to the cooler to my left and saw the yellow wonder you see here.

“I’ll take the La Dorada,” I said to the waiter.

Moments later, my friend and I were drinking this. It looks like Mountain Dew but tastes like the trashiest, low-rent soft drink of the Southern States: Big Red.

Nectar of the Gods? Um. No.

For those of you who have never had the pleasure, Big Red is fun to drink, but you’ll be disgusted with yourself for enjoying it. It tastes like Bazooka bubble gum with the volume turned all the way up in liquid form. It’s so sugary you might swear it’s thicker than your average soda – a carbonated syrup infused with a dye that probably causes cancer.

This “La Dorada de la Pachamama” is “Inca” flavored. La Pachamama is the Mother Earth goddess of the people of the Andes. Perhaps you don’t believe that a soft drink company could be this tacky? I assure you, it is.

This is absurd in the same way that naming a knock-off Laffy Taffy, “Peter at the Pearly Gates” would be, further classifying its treacly sweet flavor as “Catholic.” But there are still Catholics around to object, I guess.

Economic disparity, the western affinity for our animals, capitalistic commodification of the human being, comfort vs. exploitation, privilege, world politics.

Roses are Red by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

Do you see it?

Roses are Red by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

Before I tell you what Angie Reed Garner has to say about this painting I will admit to simply appreciating the work on first glance for the extraordinary textures and colors typical of her work.

I will admit to recognizing the dog, to zooming in on the text of classified ads and thinking, Labor Camps? I imagined the translucent figure with the sunflowers sprouting from him was a dead man – a ghost or an impression. I didn’t make the intended connections, but it still got me thinking.

Look a little closer.

Roses are Red, detail, by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

Roses are Red, detail, by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

Roses are Red, detail, by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

Garner is a painter from the United States. Earlier works fed from mythology. Each piece tells a story – sometimes a very complex one like this that reads like a modern hieroglyph. Symbol heavy, the artist creates her own visual language with ties to historically understood meanings. Her work would be a never-ending feast for a semiotician.

Currently living in the UAE after a year in Lahore, Pakistan, exposure to blatant economic disparity among other culture shocks have made work like this possible for the self taught painter.

Here is what the artist has to say about this painting:

‘Roses are Red’ is about living alongside and participating in the extreme income disparity in Pakistan and here in the UAE. The same disparity exists in the United States as well, but it is much harder to see.

I give my dog a better life than many are able to earn for themselves and their families no matter how hard they work, and they work insanely hard in conditions that would drop me. 50C heat kills.

Roses are Red, detail, by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

“Expat” is a series of paintings Garner has painted since arriving in the UAE last summer. Also included in the show is a panel of ten canvases about her experience in Lahore.

Below, you’ll find a sample of some of her most recent work from the UAE.

Women by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

House of Pi by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

Cracked by Angie Reed Garner, 2009, Oil on Canvas, 20×64″, all rights reserved

The show opens July first and runs until August 15th in Evansville, Indiana at J.E. Smith Gallery.

Visit the artist’s website at angiereedgarner.com and check out her blog at LiveJournal where she shares much of her process and logic.

Perhaps it’s in the United States that you’ll see the most striking, well cultivated and impressive in the world.

Photos - left Blonde in Tulsa as photographed by raveller, right Brunette in Las Vegas 2003 by TedsBlog

If the now defunct Mullets Galore website proved anything, it was that we all seem to feel that the mullet is worth only our jeers, its wearer deserving to be dubbed the name of his haircut.

It was explained to me once when I laughed at the blue faced, mulleted warriors in Braveheart that the haircut had a practical application. It allowed the wearer to shirk the harmful effects of the sun to the back of his neck while being able wield a weapon with unobstructed vision. Being a diehard utilitarian, I had to take a moment to give the mullet its due before resuming my obnoxious diatribe disparaging the hairdo.

Photo: GenuineMongol

If this statue is to be believed, Ghengis Khan may be wearing a mullet under there. Could one of the fiercest warriors of all time have sported a mullet?

Below, enjoy and savor this collection of mullets from around the globe.

It is far from complete.

Sadly I was unable to find photographic evidence of the mullet in Africa, thereby rounding out my cavalcade of continents.

Photos - left Colombian extreme half mohawk-half mullet by snarkhunt, right Guatemalan mullet man with a live turkey by gringologue

Photos - left in Bangladesh, this mullet hearkens back to the ’80’s Jheri Curl mullet by bengal*foam, right Japanese mulleted mouth breather by alexdecarvalho

Photos -left Art school mulleted hipster in London by weegeebored, right Silver fox in Prague by discosour

Photos - left Clear delineation twixt front and back in Spain by JaseMan, right Nose picking mulleted hiker in Croatia by h-angele

Photos - left a most impressive mullet in Canada by D’Arcy Norman, right fresh mullet in Australia by Hyperlegs

Check out this article on Matador Goods: Gear Review + Giveaway: Sansa slotRadio Player

No lie. With less than 50 words, you can win a super compact mp3 player that doubles as a radio and holds 1,000 songs.

Photo: tinkerroll21

Write the title and artist of the song you choose – one that’s near and dear to your heart for its ability to inspire you to travel – or one that calls you to a place out there in the world or back home again. Briefly explain to us how and why it moves you and leave that explanation in the comments field in the article linked above.

That’s it!

You have one week. Hey, that’s less than 8 words a day you have to write!

Top entrants will have their words featured here along with downloadable mp3’s of their picks. Share the music you love and win.

Feature photo by flattop341

Huye de Mi translates to Escape from Me. This is a song of lost love, but think about it as an escape from a place or a way of thinking that you want to be free of – if you can’t speak Spanish, that is.

If you can speak Spanish, you’ll realize that this song carries the weight of regret mixed with relief that we so often feel at the end of a relationship. Complex and truthful, it is a song about moving on.

Now motivate!

Feature Photo by torres21

Photo: * etoile

In a New York Times article from September, 2008, food critic Michelle Green writes of one such meal when she partook of hairy crab on a visit to Shanghai.

Is it the fact that you choose your hairy crab live and are thus assured of its freshness? Is the name itself, the blatantly sexual sound of it, part of the reason that foodies worldwide proclaim its virtues as a heavenly, must-try food?

Green and her friends did everything right. They chose a restaurant – Wang Bao He – much loved among hairy crab fanatics. They questioned the waitress to make sure they were ordering the most succulent preparation. They ordered the wine that is said to be the perfect compliment.

“The smell,” said Terry, “is like dirty river water.” Under the carapaces lurked gelatinous black deposits; instead of sweet meat, we discovered stringy, bland flesh.

Photo: Dennis Wong

Apparently the hairy crab has fallen victim to not so stringent pollution regulations, the market for it rife with counterfeiters.

Don’t ask me how to counterfeit a hairy crab. I couldn’t begin to tell you.

Is the global financial crisis affecting the Kiwis so profoundly that they have to rob the US of its richest eligible singles? Who else would be spending the nearly $800 for the ticket?

Photo: the half-blood prince

The tagline, apparently targeting the helplessly brainwashed, straight and desperate American masses with a grand to burn (consider the cocktails) is “How far will you go to find the one?”

Perhaps a more accurate question would be, “How pissed will you be when you spend $800 and travel half a world on an endless international flight to find that you can’t get laid here either and you’re not getting home anytime soon?”

Photos and Feature Photo: the jyan

Indeed, for those who find themselves having a terrible time, it’s far worse than a blind date in the ol’ hometown. Here there will be no escape from the glaring failure as Sandra skips off with a more sex-worthy catch and you wait for another overnight flight back to L.A. during which there will be only cocktail service and a courtesy blanket to comfort you.

The whole thing smacks of a reality show.

About the only guaranteed positive is that this may be the only international fight you’ll ever have been on without a relentlessly sobbing child.

They just completed a second tour that spanned the West coast’s Highway 1. Playing wherever they were welcome and some planned dates in between, the tour was an adventure that garnered a lot of attention for the band.

Photo and Feature Photo: mlindema

It would be easy to see this mode of touring as a gimmick, but Blind Pilot has the musical fortitude to back it up.

I heard the story on NPR.

Now on tour by van, you can check out what’s going on with Blind Pilot at their official website.

Photo and feature photo of Bohemian Carnival at DNA Lounge: zemistor

Operating as DNA since November of 1985, the club has had a number of notable owners including Rob Schneider, but is now in the hands of the tech-savvy and fascinating Jamie Zawinski. (Blog)

DNA hosts all sorts of events from fashions shows to dance parties to live music.

Photo of Booty – Smashup Bootleg Party: flawedartist

Live events are webcast in audio and video. If you’d like to have a look at what’s going on in there, you can here. Any time the club is open, 10 video cameras inside go live in rotation over the web and you can hear the audio from the sound system.

Where else can you preview a night out like this?

375 Eleventh Street
San Francisco

Apparently armed with a camera at the ready at all times, poised to capture hot babe action, these two are always on the look out for what they call “man babes.” They catalogue them much as an entomologist does insect life, giving titles to the masses of hot men they find along the way.

Excerpted from the site:

Is it post-feminist? Is it silly? Will it bring a smile to your face? From the East to the West coast of the U.S.A. with submissions garnered from anyplace a babe can be found, the answers to the above questions are yes, yes, and yes.

Featuring a playlist that includes Run D.M.C., Wanda Jackson, Eminem, Aretha Franklin, The Yardbirds and Metallica, this show seriously rocks.

Here’s a performance of Run D.M.C with Aerosmith doing “Walk This Way” in 2002:

Checking out the original video will make you wonder why awesome collaborations like this don’t seem to happen anymore (embedding disabled but available for viewing on youtube here).

Chuck D packs the spaces between the songs with interesting tidbits of information about the inductees, taking a break from the normal “On the Real” political talk format to bring us his picks – guaranteed to rock your afternoon or evening for 75 minutes.

Listen to the show here:

Download it for yourself here. Subscribe to “On the Real with Chuck D” here, and check out the inductees into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame here.

There are only two original members in the lineup.

David Johansen, frontman of mainstream “Hot Hot Hot” fame (as Buster Poindexter) still sings, and Sylvain Sylvain still plays guitar, as he has since a few months out from the band’s inception in 1971.

In this video, you can see the spazdic Johansen shake his ass and share the mic with the showy original lead guitarist Johnny Thunders. A gold corseted Arthur Kane can be seen rocking the bass years prior to his conversion to Mormonism and subsequent death from Leukemia shortly after the bands first reunion in 2004.

Jerry Nolan beats the crap out of the drums while Sylvain Sylvain plays hot licks stage right in black hat and maroon pants, though there never is a clear shot of his face.

Personality Crisis contains all the charming qualities about the Dolls. Johansen’s lyrics betray an empathy and understanding as he tells it like it is, a cro-magnon man in make-up, he makes up in energy and sincerity what he may be lacking in singing ability.

The metallic sounds of the guitars and bass were originals to the second rate knock offs done by many an eighties hair band. Look at these guys. Take the overt gender bending out of their look and all the soul out of their sound and you have the template for all the Whitesnakes and Warrants you could want.

It’s pure rock and roll and it’s got heart. I’ll be happy to say I’ve seen them a couple of weeks from now, even if most of them are now dead.

Download the mp3 of Personality Crisis (Live at the Fillmore East) here or the original version here from Amazon.

The promise of sex with a foreigner crosses your mind as you make your reservations, browse hostels online and pack your bags.

Photo and feature photo: masochismtango

Will the women in the countries you visit be interested in you?  I can’t help you with that part, but it does seem in the places I’ve been that the guys who are foreign (you) have the cachet of being from somewhere else.  Depending on how you work it, you could be attracting girls left and right, but they won’t be going anywhere with you if you seem like a bummer of a lay.

Girls can tell a lot about whether they want to sleep with you in a few moments of closeness.  Allow me to share a couple of tips with you so you can make those moments count and get a second chance.

Desperation is obvious.

Before you even go out, you have to get the stink of it off of you. Whatever it takes to you to calm the hell down, do it.  There’s nothing that’s more of a turn off than a sexually desperate guy.

It’s all about the kiss.

Guys, I can’t stress this enough.  Once you’re into kissing, take it slow.  Follow her lead and tempo.  Far too many guys never get a second chance because they treat kissing like a game of thumb war, determined to take down the opponent’s tongue.  Don’t try to choke her out or restrict her wind pipe.  It’s not hot.

You should look at it as a way of getting to know her, not a way of proving that your tongue can go into turbo drive.  Be calm and self assured in your kissing and don’t get too fancy – at least not at first.

Photo: manu_el_o_matic!

Groping – Don’t give her the bad touch.

Be aware that a man’s and woman’s ‘erogenous zones’ do not operate in the same way.  If you haven’t figured it out yet, the skin of the vagina is like delicate tissue paper compared to what you’ve got.  If you get that far, don’t treat the crotch of a girl as you do your own.

Rule of thumb (and fingers): Use 1/10th the pressure you would on your own genitals.  If she wants it harder, she’ll make up for the torque you’re lacking – then you can adjust.

Tip – Try using the flat of your hand.  In the dark and through layers of clothes, it’s just inadvisable to go digging a single finger.  Use the butt of your hand to rub the general area.  You’ll be able to tell when you’re doing it right.

The most important thing is to be aware of her.

Is she responding to what you’re doing?  Change it up and see if she seems to like it any better.  Pay more attention to her reaction than to your pal downstairs and you might make enough of an impression to get her to pay a little attention to him.

Women like to think that you’re interested in what they have to say – maybe you even are.  If you’re not, you’ll have to fake it.  This extends to getting it on as well.  Ask her.  If she is quiet and less than expressive, ask if she likes the way you’re doing what you’re doing.  It’s such a rare thing to do, you’re bound to impress her.  If she’s embarrassed to say, ask her to show you.

This is just the tip of the iceberg, guys, but there are some nuggets of information that can serve you well on your home turf as well as abroad.  Use your foreign charm and  knock ‘em dead.

Travel offers new perspectives, but in traveling, you’ll certainly notice that there is a common thread among humanity – heart-breaking, moving, inspiring and abhorrent. We scramble through our days – and what’s life for if not to experience everything we can, everywhere we can?

Better still if we can tell people a little about what it’s like.

Best of all if we can encourage someone else to do the same.

I am proud to be included in Matador Nights along with the incredible wit of Matador Life Editor Tom Gates and the profound observations that can be found in the entertaining writings of Matador Senior Editor David Miller.

Matador Nights has gotten a facelift along with the rest of the site. We may look better than ever, but we are still getting jostled by the bumps in the road and we’re still here to tell you all about it. The change in format extends to a new breed of work whereby we inject a little more fun into the pages with some shorter, punchier pieces.

We want to know what you think, too. We’ll take it into consideration. Let us know here. Stick your toe in the water and join our community. If you want to do more than just tell us what you think, show us by contributing.

Stay tuned in by subscribing, and get Matador in your inbox.

Photos Kate Sedgwick

There were plenty of amazing things and people to see at Tattoo Show Buenos Aires 2009. Many of the country’s most modified people mingled with the estimated 12,000 convention-goers.

I spotted no less than four camera crews with their noteworthy television personalities in tow excitedly explaining to the un-tattooed masses watching from home just what these strange looking people were doing in the Bauen Hotel.

Sponsored by Mandinga Tattoo, this was the fifth year of this convention that in past years was called Convención Nacional de Tatuajes, but now goes by the simple name Tattoo Show.

300 tattoo artists, supply vendors, body modifiers of all sorts including piercers, branders and scarifiers from as far away as Europe and the U.S. and all over South and Central America gathered for three days. The modified came to see and be seen and maybe get some work done.

A tattoo convention is a unique opportunity to compare many artists in one place. Each tattooist has an album of their work on the table at the front of the booth and you get the chance to watch them in action, flip through their books and to ask questions if you’re so inclined.

Tattoo Show 2009 offered three floors of action including an auditorium in which 20 bands played throughout the afternoons and evenings.

The pageantry of Miss Tattoo and a contest for the best tattoos were commented on and judged by a panel of tipsy guys.

One of them inexpertly operated a video camera that fed two live monitors on either side of the stage while various punk rock hits played throughout at medium volume.

What I learned

I learned several things during Tattoo Show 2009. There is an Argentine branch of the Hell’s Angels, for instance. Here are some on the right escaping my camera:

I also met the Alberto Fornes, known as “El Mago,” renowned as the most tattooed man in Argentina (above, left). Highly personable, he shook my hand and asked about my plastic wrapped arm that had just been tattooed.

Here you can see that he will be 52 next month, though he seems much younger. Easy as it is to assume someone with so many tattoos would be exhibiting a cooler-than-thou attitude, I was happy to be recognized by him in passing and greeted warmly the following day. He was alive with excitement in an atmosphere so wholly dedicated to tattoos.

Beer was everywhere. Tattooists were drinking and tattooing at the same time.

I even saw a brimming plastic cupful in the drink caddy of a stroller. Here you can see crates of empties on their way to be recycled mid-day.

Of all the artists at work during the convention, I saw only one woman. Salome Sajnin’s shop is called Calavera No Chilla. Here she is, gloved and ready to go under a poster of one of her paintings.

The most impressive thing I saw by far was this tattoo of a dragon fish being done.

Diego Ortiz spent about three hours filling in the very simple outline he’d laid out using a photograph for reference. The guy getting tattooed endured Diego adding layer upon layer of ink for this full color, photorealistic piece without so much as a sigh.

Ortiz looked back and forth between the ankle and the picture in between interruptions from many friends who stopped by to shoot the breeze.

There’s a little something for everyone at a convention like this. The curious can get an eyeful and do a little shopping for some clothes that make them feel just a little weirder while those looking for an artist get the opportunity to find someone who melds with their style.

People in various states of undress show off piercings, tattoos and brands with nary a fear of the stink eye.

Next March, if you happen to be in Buenos Aires, you’re sure to see something to remember if you swing by Tattoo Show 2010.

All Photos by Kate Sedgwick